We also practice the escalation technique known as 'mind-reading' when we don't allow the other person to finish their sentence. Think how someone 'cutting you off in mid-sentence' feels. Some thoughts people experience include feelings of discount, not being listened too, my thoughts are not important, etc.
How do we de-escalate?
Focus on behavior and avoid speculations about motives and intentions. People rarely deliberately thwart or attempt to make each other miserable. Think for a moment, the illogic of deliberately making another person miserable. You are around that person, therefore, subject yourself to being miserable too.
It is important to check assumptions before they lead to communication problems.
Example: NOT "(S)He is deliberately saying/doing this to make me angry or hurt me" but rather, "I can't read his/her mind, so I really don't know why they are saying or doing this."
