Unii's Personal Dealings with MS

Multiple Sclerosis Links

Jump to the Latest Update in My MS Battle
Personal Links
Listservs, Newsletters & Newsgroups Links
Resource & Informative Links
Health and Medical Insurance Links
Treatments, Doctors & Wellness Links
Products & Aides Links

     As I said, I was diagnosed on December 13, 1995. It was NOT easy getting to that point though! It took me nearly 6+ months to get that diagnosis! And they weren't fun months either! In retrospect, I guess I should have kept a journal of some type, just for my own knowledge. It would have made life and doing this now much easier!

     What I recall is this (of course David says there is like a lot more to it, but I am writing what I remember at the moment!)... David was away for the week on a business trip. My older son, Matthew, was in Kindergarten at the time. I was laid up on the couch with dehydration, total numbness of my left arm and leg and right side of my face, and dizziness. Matthew did his best to keep the house up while I was out of commission, and he did his best! Anyway...It began about a week beforehand with a massive stabbing pain behind my right eye...a pain that sort of went right through my head as if someone were to poke you straight through the back of your head and through your eye with a knitting needle. I let that go for a while, thinking it to only be a migraine.

     After David returned from his business trip and saw me laying on the couch and the house an utter shambles, he took me straight to the hospital emergency room! Of course, I was treated for the dehydration (I hadn't eaten or drank anything in a week, because I could not keep anything down period!), then they released me, not thinking anything of the numbness etc. They referred me to an internal medicine doctor, who at that time, off the record told me that he honestly felt that it was MS. I was scared but somewhat relieved! I left his office feeling a little better and more consoled! He also treated me for the dehydration and told me that I was NOT insane, just not diagnosed :) I went home and got online and did research on MS... What little I found online helped me immensely! I KNEW I had MS, it was just a matter of proving it. I kept my mouth shut to the doctors and waited. I got well of the dehydration, but the numbness was still there, and my ability to walk was nil! David returned me to the ER about a week after the first visit. They did a CAT scan, which showed nothing! Laying on the ER bed, I recall the ER Doctor speaking with the ER nurse saying something along the lines of, "She's insane, there isn't anything wrong with her! It's all in her head!" (YEAH, JERK, MS IS in the HEAD, literally!) Needless to say, I got up off the bed with a dizzying motion, got clothed, looked at David and told him that I wanted to leave NOW! The ER had given the advice to go see a neuro after this visit! I went to see him, but I didn't return because things were so up in the air. At least not till this all acted up again! Yep, another trip to the ER, where they finally sent me to my neuro again. This time, my neuro ordered an MRI, spinal tap, and blood tests to be done!

     After the long months of hearing everything from "It's in your head!" to "I think you have Multiple Sclerosis" to "It's nothing dear!"...I was finally satisfied with the MRI, spinal tap, and blood test results. BUT...I had to wait for another exacerbation to occur before my neuro could diagnose it properly as Relapsing/Remitting. MORE waiting...but my body didn't let me down! Less than a month later, the numbness, dragging leg, vision problems, and dizziness all came back! I was thrown onto steroids (IV Solu-Medrol). I was lucky enough to have insurance that covered an in home nurse to come do the IVs 3 times a day! After 5 days treatment of the Solu-Medrol, I was put onto Prednisone and tapered off of that after about 5 more days. Around Feb. 13, 1996, I was placed into Betaseron® training and began Betaseron® therapy! David and I learned how to give the injections and how to care for the equipment etc. Let me tell you, it was a god-send, at the time! I must admit though, that after that first shot with the RN present, it took me about a month or two to give myself another shot! David was doing it, but I was determined to do it...and I made myself do it! David had to go out of town again for his work and it was a shot night...I *had* to do it this time! I did it...finally finding a way that I was comfortable with...I was then poking myself every other night, and it was quite easy! For 3 years I was on Betaseron® until the shots started eating away my flesh at the shot sites. I had not had a really bad exacerbation since I was put on the Betaseron® back in 1996, until February through April of 2002.

     I was also prescribed Amantadine (back when I was first diagnosed) for my fatigue, which I battle on a daily basis. I no longer use the Amantadine! I don't like the idea of being dependant upon a drug for energy! The less medications in my body, the quicker it heals itself! I do try to keep up on my vitamins! And as an extra precaution, around menstruation time I take iron tablets as an extra umph! It's not much, but it does help!

     My father, being a Chiropractor, has gone out of his way to help me with my MS! He went out and ordered me some Flax Seed Oil, which was NASTY, but I took it because daddy gave it to me :) *GiGgLe* I must admit, it did help some! The fatigue was not there all the time like it was before the Flax Seed Oil! The only problem with the Flax Seed Oil is 1) it tastes horrible, 2) is hard to find, and 3) smells as nasty as it tastes! So my dad gave me Barlean's Omega Twin Capsules (1000 mg) instead. I also take Nature's Resource® Standardized Cranberry Juice Concentrate, 405 mg to help with the recurrent UTIs. I also take, as a daily multi-vitamin Walgreens Gold Seal Woman's Way Multiple Vitamins Caplets. My father also has me on Vitaminerals, Inc.® C-Max de/cel No. 63 tablets and their Neurotex No.119.

     As for what I recommend...I recommend you do as you feel is right for you! Bee sting therapy doesn't appeal to me, seeing as I am allergic to bee stings :) But what might not work for me, might work for you! Who is to say what is right/wrong/indifferent! All I know is that I have heard of ALL types of therapies for MS...and the only way I have actually seen any results is with a natural approach. Granted the Betaseron® was not all that natural, but it helped *ME* at that time! I suggest getting to know your body's limitations and then not trying to fight them, as I do most of the time! It only gets you into more trouble than it's worth! Learn what is the best time during the day for you to do certain activities, and then do them...rest in the evenings before going to bed...or if you are like me, you will end up cramping in the middle of the night! But above all else...realize that you have the MS, and it doesn't have you! Control it and maintain it as best you can! Also recognize the fact that depression IS a part of MS and most of it's therapies, so don't be afraid to tell your doctor about any warning signs of depression!

Update as of 2-16-02

     I began having a relapse as of Wednesday, February 13, 2002. The left side of my face, and left arm are affected.

     Needless to say, I was due for a relapse. It's been exactly 6 years since my last exacerbation. Almost to the date. My last exacerbation ended right before I started the Betaseron® back on Feb. 13, 1996...Coincidence...I hope! :)

     Anyway, I am currently taking a tapering dosage of Prednisone, and have an appointment with the neurologist who originally diagnosed me back in 1995, Leonard M Weinberger MD. I am really glad he is on my current insurance plan, because I really wouldn't feel comfortable with any other neurologist. I had two down in Tennessee, but didn't really get along with them as well as Dr. Weinberger.

     So, anyway, I am scheduled to see Dr. Weinberger on March 15, 2002, for the first time since I moved to Knoxville. Now that I am back in Ohio, I don't mind driving 41.2 miles just to see him! :) And the secretary was really cool and glad I was coming back. Even says she's thought about me often, when passing our old house in Painesville. :)

     Anyway, I will update everyone when/as things progress...err maybe I should re-phrase that...as things get better! *crossing fingers* Right now I am just worried about continuing working, trying to reduce my stress (which DEFINITELY triggered this exacerbation), and resting.

Update as of 3-26-02

     Welp, I saw Dr. Weinberger, and went in for the MRI. It was great seeing him after so many years! We are waiting on the MRI results. Stress has reduced MAJORLY! The exacerbation left after the Prednisone...I have full capabilities and am back to normal...if there is a "normal" for me! LOL!

Update as of 4-1-02

     Got a call from Dr. Weinberger, and he pretty much wants me on Copaxone®. I have two rather large lesions...a really big one on the right side of my brain...obviously...my left leg and arm are affected. Another medium sized lesion, but I forget where he said it was. Anyway, I have another appointment on April 9^th to discuss the matter of Copaxone®. I am rather leery about going on another injection, after the site reactions with the Betaseron, but the more I read on Copaxone®, the more I am feeling better about it. We'll see!

Update as of 4-10-02

     Well, I went in yesterday for a consultation with my neuro. Needless to say, he wants me on Copaxone®. I have done a lot of reading and research into the drug, and it seems I won't be having the massive flesh-eating injection site reaction from the Copaxone® as I did from the Betaseron®. Also, with the amount of stress I have recently been under lately, I think it's in my best interest to start "managing" my MS more than just the vitamins etc. So I left a message for my neuro to go ahead and prescribe the drug, but I need the script written up for a 1 year supply (3 months of doses, with 3 refills) for my mail order service. That will save me tons throughout the years that I am on Copaxone®. Anyway, I have also signed up with Shared Solutions™. So, we'll see how things go. It's not like I am not used to giving myself shots! :)

Update as of 4-11-02

     Well, last night I had one of the most uncomfortable nights of my life. As I was leaving work at 10:30 pm, I noticed my left leg and arm going numb again. As I was driving home, my left leg started clenching up and spasming. When I got home and groped my way up to bed carefully, so as not to fall down the steps, my leg continuously spasmed. My toes kept curling up, the muscles in my leg kept spasming. Needless to say, it was a whole night of this. I got maybe an hour of uninterrupted sleep. The pain from it was excruciating. I ended up going downstairs to sleep on the couch at about 2 am, so that I wouldn't wake up David with the spasms and my sobs from the pain. I ended up waking at 6 am, TRIED to get ready to go to work, but barely made it through my shower. I had to call off for the first time in my life due to the MS. I called my neuro and left a message at about 7:30 am telling him what was going on. He called me back a little after 9 am to tell me he was calling in a prescription for Baclofen for the spasms. He also thinks that this is a transient symptom of my last exacerbation, so he doesn't want to prescribe the Prednisone at this time, unless it continues for a while longer. So in a nutshell, I had to call off for today and tomorrow. Luckily this is my scheduled weekend off, so I am going to get 4 days off to recuperate. Hopefully things are back to normal before Monday! It even took me about 1/2 hr to type this paragraph up...fun.

Update as of 4-16-02

     Well, as of today I started the Solu-Medrol IV treatments for 3 days. Needless to say, I cannot work with an IV in me. The left leg is wobbly..."jelly-like", to quote David Lander. I have "drop foot"...and am beginning to remember why MS sucks. I guess the 6 years of no major symptoms has caught up with me. Typing with one hand bites too. Anyway, pity-party over... I will be doing a tapering dose of Prednisone as of Friday, and if all goes well, I will be back to work on Monday. I hate the taste in my mouth from the Solu-Medrol. Nothing tastes good...blech. I have sent in my script for the Copaxone, just waiting on the mail order pharmacy to send it out.

     I did however spend a great part of my day yesterday reading Fall Down, Laughing : How Squiggy Caught Multiple Sclerosis and Didn't Tell Nobody by David L. Lander. So, at least I have had time to sit back and do something I have been wanting to do for a while now. My son, Matthew, went up to the library and got me that book and Life Lessons and Reflections by Montel Williams and Living Beyond Multiple Sclerosis : A Woman's Guide by Judith Lynn Nichols. So at least I am not just at home watching reruns of Jerry Springer all day!

     I don't know, but this time, it's really hard to try not to "fake" it in front of people. I mean, the last time it happened, 6 years ago, I wasn't working, wasn't driving, and lived quite a ways from many of my friends and family. Even the visiting nurse who set me up with the IV, I tried to walk ok and seem ok around. It's as if I admit defeat if someone, even David and the boys, sees me in the full-fledged exacerbation. I know it's stupid, but it kind of helps "me" get through it. Reading David Lander's book made me realize that I am not the only one out there that tries to "hide" these things. And although my story is here in black and white for all to read, I still kind of try to hide it, by not just coming out and talking about it when I could/should.

     Life will go on...it has to, and I plan on going on with it. But I do realize that my stress levels are obviously way too high. That, I believe was the main trigger. It's been laying around latent for 6 years, waiting for me to start planning my wedding...ha ha ha, and waiting till I found a job that I really love and want to stick with for a long time. Such is life...you deal with it one moment at a time, and go on. Don't get me wrong, "I" don't ignore that I have MS, I just don't let it rule my world... I was still up...being my stubborn self, trying to vacuum my house, clean the kitchen, and do many other stupid things, like taking my son's lunch to him at school, in the car...duh, when I should not have been driving! But, I AM a mom before an MSer! I had my kids before MS, I had David before MS, and I had a life before MS, and I will be damned if some spasms, numbness, and drop leg will stop me from being who and what I am! Anyway, that's my 1 hr. of typing gripe for the day.

Update as of 4-21-02

     Ok, I am not one to really preach or go on about God or anything, and I think those who do are great, or annoying...whatever. Anyway, I was at church today, and one of the Bible Readings for the day hit home...and hard. I even started crying in church...so I thought I would share it with you all. It just kind of hit home with the pain that I have been in with the MS, IV, steroids, etc. So, if you like it, read it, if you don't, just pass on by it! :)

1 Peter 2:19-25
¹⁹ It is a credit to you if, being aware of God, you endure pain while suffering unjustly. ²⁰ If you endure when you are beaten for doing wrong, what credit is that? But if you endure when you are right and suffer for it, you have God's approval. ²¹ For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you should follow in his steps.
²² "He committed no sin,
and no deceit was found in his mouth."
²³ When he was abused, he did not return abuse; when he suffered, he did not threaten; but he entrusted himself to the one who judges justly. ²⁴ He himself bore our sins in his body on the cross, so that, free from sins, we might live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. ²⁵ For you were going astray like sheep, but now you have returned to the shepherd and guardian of your souls.

     Ok, enough of that! An update on me... I am off the IV Solu-Medrol, have been since 4-18-02. Talk about sore, achy, cranky, and just plain unpleasant. As of 4-19-02, I am now on a course of Prednisone that will last for 12-13 days...a tapering dose. So even more pain and achiness on the way. I will begin taking the Copaxone about a week after I get off of the Prednisone. I had the nurse from the Copaxone training call to set up an appointment. Anyway, I am assuming that I will take my first Copaxone injection around May 8, 2002.

     I have come to a very large conclusion in my life though. Don't sweat the small stuff...and it's ALL small stuff! I don't know, but this last exacerbation was kind of a wake up call. It was more than obvious that my life is way too over-stressed. I am trying to look at things in a new perspective, trying to get past things that would normally bother me. I have really determined what is really important to me, and it is NOT the job (though I love it and will stay), it's NOT the wedding cake, the dress, the DJ, the hand-painted flowers, the invitations, or the church bulletins. It's my family, and everything around me. It's the things that REALLY mean something in the end. It's what gets you through each day. It's the little things in life, like going up to Malley's Ice Cream Shop and just splurging on a $5.65 NutMalley Ice Cream Sundae because you haven't been able to taste anything in days due to the steroids. I have pretty much decided that I am not going to let myself get stressed over things that I cannot control. I am also going to just smell the roses more often. Life is too short, and there's so much more out there. Why waste it stressing over the ignorant stuff!?

Update as of 4-27-02

     Ok, I have a scary experience to share with everyone. Imagine me getting out of my car, and walking to the grocery store front door. Except, when I get around to the back of my car, something just doesn't feel "right". I look at the door to the grocery store, look down at my feet, and think, "My God, that's a VERY LONG way away!" Suddenly my leg, side, arm, face, and hand start to contract and get weak. I don't quite know what is going on, but think I realize that I am having a muscle spasm that's affecting the entire left side of my body. I am two cars away from my car, and an eternity away from the door to the store. My footing isn't so sure, and I am looking around to see if there is anyone that might possibly help me get back to my car. By sheer will and determination, I do an about face, and decide wholeheartedly that I will go back to my car. Holding onto the bumpers of other people's cars, I make my way back to my car door, miraculously. Keys in hand, I fumble with the car lock...taking what seems to be forever to open the lock. The door finally unlocks, I pull open the door with my right hand, because the left hand is balled up in a grotesque display of muscular disfigurement. I throw my purse into the passenger's side seat, and flop into the car. I keep thinking to myself, "My God, what's going on?" The only thing I can think of is, "I need to go to the store darn it!" and, "Maybe it will pass soon!" I crazily grasp for my cell phone, fumbling with it as I try to dial with one hand. Who to call? David...ok...I call David. I am in tears. I try to calm myself down enough to talk, but my speech is also being affected by the spasms. I tell David what is happening. He and I determine that I should sit still in the car until it passes. A few moments (ok it felt like forever) pass. The spasms stop. I get back out of my car, grab my purse and try all over again. I get about 20 of the longest feet I have ever walked away from the front door of the store, and another set of spasms hit. The grocery store kid is sitting on the bench watching me, and watching the whole thing from when I first left my car. I look at him and say, "I may not make it to the door, if I fall before I can grab a cart, please dial "DAVID" on my cell phone!" The kid, about 18 years old, laughs, thinking I am joking. His laughter makes me only more determined to do this on my own. I take it one step at a time, fighting the contractions of my leg and arm. One step at a time, concentrating on foot placement and movement. What seems like a year passes, and I hear the automatic door slide open. THANK GOD for those things! I would have never been able to open a big door! I grab onto a cart, and let my left hand, which is grossly deformed, wrap around the handle of it. I pull back the cart, grab on with the other hand, take a quick deep breath, and walk through the other set of automatic doors. Chalk one up to pure determination! Darn it, I made it through you nasty ominous beasts!

Update as of 4-28-02

     I am still dealing with the spasticity. I am currently taking ¼ to ½ a Baclofen pill twice a day. It makes the spasms less painful. I am dealing with spasms about once an hour, and they are only lasting for 30 seconds to a minute each. That is much more able to be dealt with than all night and constant spasms and pain!

     It was obviously apparent in church today. I had several members of the congregation "confront" me today. It actually felt rather good to tell them why I was becoming a circus contortionist in the middle of church. Some were shocked, some sympathised, but most just nodded and went on. I mean, what do you say to someone when they tell you they have MS? A lot of akward silences later, I finally told my Pastor later tonight that if he was questioned about my health or anything, he could feel free to explain that I have MS. I figured, at least that way, he won't feel as though he was telling someone something that I didn't want anyone to know. :)

Update as of 5-7-02

     Well, I woke up today with a pretty bad cough. I was expecting this after all of the steroids, that tends to make one prone to infections. I have put on 10 pounds as well...Joy! Anyway, I gave myself my first Copaxone® shot today. It went very well. Just like the Betaseron, but easier with the MixJect vial adaptor. No messing with needles bending or breaking in the vials! WooHoo! :) I am feeling a bit on the blah side though, but I think that's due to the chest cold I am getting. Anyway, just wanted to let everyone know that I am now on Copaxone® and it seems to be doing well with me.

Update as of 5-11-02

     Well, I am on my 5th shot of Copaxone as of tonight. The only side effects that I have gotten are a "lump" at the injection site, redness, and some burning, all of these go away after applying ice to the area for about 5 minutes. I have not had anymore spasticity since about a week and a half ago. Yay! That was rough to deal with. I am trying to get more people for the Fairview Park, OH NMSS Support Group. I think it's time that I talk to more people around me that have MS, and understand it. I am glad to be back to work, but I think the late nights and early mornings are getting to be too much for my body. I might just have to request the late nights be dropped, for familial reasons as well. Anyway, things physically are better, and I am back to taking naps, just to help out half way through my day, between split shifts.

Update as of 5-1-03

     Welp, I started Copaxone back on May 7, 2002. It's almost been been a year to date. The only side effects I am getting from it is the itching/burning at the injection site, and an occasional vein is hit. Nothing major so far! Yay! So that is going well.

     On the other hand...I have been dealing with depression, and am now currently taking Zoloft to help with that. My hubby and kids seem to think it's working...they say I am slowly getting back to "my old self". So...I guess things are ok now...

Update as of 12-30-03

     Ok, it started Christmas Eve, Dec. 24, 2003...I started getting the slurred speech..joy. This proceeded to remain this whole time. About Christmas day, I got the "drop leg". I have been feeling kind of weird all week. So I finally get up the nerve to call the neuro. Of course, he is out of town on vacation, as we all should be. I am now awaiting for him to get back to me through his secretary to set up the IV SoluMedrol. Ahhh the joys of my life. The"drop leg" has stopped, all I have now is "rubber legs". You know, when you can't trust that your leg is going to work/support you. Whee!

     I just have to thank God that I chose this week for vacation myself. Can't you just see me working with an IV in my arm! LOL!

Update as of 1-27-04

     Welp, three days of IV Solu-Medrol and 14 days of Prednisone later...I am doing much better! During the prednisone, I had a very rough time this time. I bloated A LOT, had heartburn massively, and just felt wiped out! There have been no residual symptoms or anything "hanging around".

     I returned to work on Monday, Jan 19, 2004, after one week of vacation and two weeks of disability leave.

     For Christmas, my loving hubby got me a one year membership to Curves For Women, so I have been doing a half hour workout every to every other day. Usually 4-5 days a week. I have discontinued the use of my Amantadine, and found that working out has given me more energy than the Amantadine. (Being overweight [a lot overweight] doesn't help any either!)

Update as of 6-24-06

     Well, I had a neato exacerbation back in April 2006. I was out of commission (ie: out of work) for a week. I went back the next Monday, even though I had broken down and bought a cane. (I thought I would always fight using a cane...guess I was wrong. It was a GREAT help this exacerbation, because I was very unsteady on my feet this time. So I now own two canes...*GaSp*; a blue floral folding cane to take in my car and a Blue Carex Designer Offset Cane. I never thought I would be one to use a cane, nor use it so much or so easily. I guess necessity breeds use! LOL!)

     Anyway, I did the IV Solumedrol with a tapering dose of Prednisone...within two weeks I was back to normal. People at work were great during this. Although I didn't like taking the week off for my exacerbation, and I probably went back to work too soon, I did come back from it. Things are doing well now! :)

Update as of 7-29-07

     Well, this is day 16 of my exacerbation...it started on Friday the 13th...go figure! This time it is affecting me mostly with slurrred speech, fatigue & loss of use of my right hand/arm, which sucks. On Sunday, the 15th, David took me up to the ER & they gave me 125mg of IV SoluMedrol...and sent me home with a very low dosage of tapering Prednisone. On the 18th, I called my neuro & he ordered the 1g SoluMedrol to be mixed with Orange Juice over a 3-hr period for three days, followed with a much higher dose of tapering Prednisone.

     It seems to be getting better...slowly...this one is hanging on a little longer than normal, probably due to the wait period on the mega-dose SoluMedrol. Dunno...

Update as of 8-10-07

     Well, this is day 28 of my exacerbation...I just went to my neurologist today as a follow-up for this flare up....luckily he thinks my right hand is JUST the MS and not the Carpal Tunnel, so it should be back to normal eventually. He wants me to start taking Provigil for my fatigue...and due to my sleep apnea. My neuro and I have determined the reason for this flare up, between the heat and the mega amounts of stress. So aside from being totally exhausted, and not being able to completely use my right hand yet....I am doing ok! I finally broke down a month ago, and purchased a Heat Relief Depot's Phase Change Cooling Vest® to try to beat the heat at work.

     To reward myself during this most wretched exacerbation, I broke out my credit cards & did some online shopping. First I bought (after much careful consideration at the shoping cart prior to submission) an iRobot® Scooba® 380 Floor Washing Robot & an iRobot® Roomba® 400! It was the best investment I have EVER made! ***By God's Grace, I will never mop or vacuum again!*** It was very difficult this time to do anything as it affected my right side instead of the usual left side. Feeling a bit overwhelmed & pissed off at my Central Nervous System, I decided that the iRobots® weren't enough. I wanted something for me! So, I did what any normal scrapper would...I ordered a great toy! I got the Xyron® Wishblade®. Some may call this excessive...and costly...and way out of my friggin mind...but if you knew what I went through this exaceration...you would too if you could! Besides, they are all items that will save me stress, time, and alleviate the Carpal Tunnel...yeah...yeah...that's my story, and I am sticking with it! LOL!

     You have such a bright outlook on things...how do you stay positive?
     If I didn't try to stay positive, I probably wouldn't be here right now! :) It's a hard thing to go through...and the "final-ness" of it all sucks! There is no cure in sight, at least not in our life-times... so you just have to look at the good things in life! If you don't you will get depressed, and we already have to fight depression as one of the symptoms! Since the diagnosis, I am looking at life in a new light... I cherish each moment with my kids, I look at the sky differently, the birds, the trees... the little things we take for granted every day! It's a whole new beautiful world out there! And I plan on experiencing everything I can while I am here, and enjoying it all!

     How does one tell one's kids about MS?
     The same way I told mine! Mine were 3 and 6 at the time! I sat down with them and explained that the little things in mommy's head (neurons) were getting bad here and there, and that it causes mommy to get sick, and tired, and and and... I also went to the NMSS and got a pamphlet that helps explain it to the kids. They also have Keep S'myelin. It's really good and geared to children! It helped! The best I can tell you is, don't hide anything from them! They know something is up anyway, so why bother to hide it! Allow them time to ask lots of questions and just be open and honest with your answers! That's all I can say on this matter.

     I hate feeling like a pain in the butt for asking my friends/family for help....what do you do?
     As for feeling like a pain in the butt...I know that feeling well! David has been great through it all too! Yes, it's a strain on the relationship at times, but he sees it for what it is...the disease, and not *me*. You have to realize that you DO need that help! You also have to realize that you DO have limits now! I know it sucks when you want to go out and run around with the kids and do all the things you could do a year or two ago, but you just can't anymore! You have to consider the weather (heat), the time of day, your level of exhaustion...etc. It's a pain, but if you talk to your friends/family about it, they WILL understand! My son, Matthew, (now 13 yrs. old) helps me immensely when my symptoms flare up! He doesn't even question what he does anymore when I am not up to par. It will grow on the kids, and they will get used to it all. They will love you whether using a cane, in a wheelchair, or having a good/bad day! Trust me!

     And as a reminder to all...you can do whatever you wish to...if only you try! *smiles* MS is a horrible disease, but one should not let it get them down! Remember, there ARE others out there, and we are more than willing to help support you!

     As Jimmie Heuga said once, "I have MS, but it doesn't have me!" -- He was a 1964 Olympics Bronze Medalist!

     As I say, "Live life for the here and now...not tomorrow or yesterday!"