Late Show with David Letterman
ddave.gif

After listening to the Motley Crue Roadies in Beavis and Butt-head Do America, did you say "I recognize that voice." And then you saw the credits and said "Who the heck is EARL HOFERT??" Well, the answer comes in Cabin Boy -- in which David Letterman's character was credited as Earl Hofert. That's right -- David Letterman was one of the Motley Crue Roadies in Beavis and Butt-head Do America.

dave.gif
topten2.jpg

And here in my right hand from my home office are the three TOP TEN lists from my trips!

"Fourth of July Movies Playing in Times Square"

As presented on the 07/04/96 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10. "Picnic in My Pants"
9. "George, Martha, Thomas and Ernesto"
8. "Thomas and Ernesto"
7. "Washington's Other Monument"
6. "The British Are Coming! The British Are Coming!"
5. "The Fondling Fathers"
4. "One if By Land, Two if Bisexual"
3. "The Slutty Professor"
2. "Don't Shoot Until You See the Whites of Their Thighs"
1. "Star-Spangled Hookers"

"Rejected Summer Olympic Events"

As presented on the 07/19/96 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10. "The Marge Schott-put"
9. "Hide the javelin"
8. "Tackle the French guy"
7. "Speed blinking"
6. "Trouser hockey"
5. "Synchronized shrugging"
4. "100-meter dash with a fat guy on your back"
3. "Female weightlifter mustache tweezing"
2. "Pantsless pole vault"
1. "Lookin' terrific"

"Things Overheard During ‘Celebrity Jeopardy'"

As presented on the 04/28/97 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN

10. "I'll take ‘Questions So Easy Even a Celebrity Has a Chance' for $1,000, Alex"
9. "Nobody's buzzing in -- Robert Downey Jr. just fell asleep on the button"
8. "Pamela Anderson sure knows her 18th century European statesmen"
7. "I'm sorry, Mr. Brando, but your answer must be in the form of the English language"
6. "That's incorrect -- but we'll give you the points anyway, O.J."
5. "For the last time, Mr. Sajak, you cannot buy a vowel"
4. "It doesn't seem fair to have an ‘Overweight Drunks' category the same night Ted Kennedy is on"
3. "Ms. Parton, you give new meaning to the phrase ‘Daily Double'"
2. "Somebody ought to tell Charlie Sheen to stop hitting on Ellen DeGeneres"
1. "Oh my God -- it's the ghost of Paul Lynde, and he's demanding to be center square!"

"Accountant Pick-Up Lines"

As presented on the 04/9/98 broadcast of LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN


10. "You've got a lovely pair of W-2's."
9. "Please, baby, let me withhold you."
8. "Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift."
7. "In my office, 'I.R.S.' stands for 'I'm really sexy.'"
6. "If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?"
5. "You're entitled to a $5,000 tax break on your municipal bond income...now let's do it."
4. "Let's fill out a 1040 -- you're a 10, and I'm 40."
3. "You're the kind of girl I could take home to mother -- which is good, since I still live with her."
2. "Lady, you make my pants file for an extension."
1. "Nice assets."
Dick Assman

Hey -- why not E-Mail Dave?



ls_logo.gifls_logo.gifls_logo.gif


back5.gif


right.gifReturn To Index


Visits:


[Index Page] [Real-Tales From Titanic] [Celebrity News] [Hollywood Tidbits] [Entertainment News] [World News] [This Day In History] [Morning Coffee] [Movies] [Family Filmgoer] [Reviews] [Wizard Of Oz] [Joke Of The Week] [Good Jokes] [Better Jokes] [Best Jokes] [New Jokes] [Book Archive] [Intimate Portrait Archive] [Short Stories] [Sayings & Poems] [Awards Won] [Win my Award] [A Summer Vacation] [Midis]

This page hosted by


geocitiesfree.gif

Get your own Free Home Page
1