Let All Our Tomorrows Begin
Author's note: Clay owns himself and his own name. I only wrote the words
to the story.
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One Sunday, several weeks down the road
The late service at Clay and Kate's church ended shortly before lunch, and the congregation was dismissed into the fellowship hall. Several of the ladies were already setting up for the potluck picnic meal that followed today's service. Kate leaned over to kiss Clay on the cheek. "I'm going to see how I can help the others out in the kitchen."
"Alright," Clay answered, watching her go.
Sarah was shortly after her. "Hey, Katydid. Good morning."
"Good morning to you too!" Kate answered brightly. "Is your food in the frig too?"
"It's the chicken salad in the Gladware container," Sarah told her. "The one with my name on it."
"Got it," Kate acknowledged. She dug in the refrigerator for her mixed fruit salad and for Sarah's dish as well. Cradling one in each arm, she made her way to the nearby counter.
Sarah frowned. "You probably should let me take one of those."
Kate shook her head. "I've got these," she said as she replaced the lids with serving spoons. "There's still more food in the frig."
"Okay..."
Once again Kate cradled each dish in the crook of an arm before turning around to take them to the fellowship hall. She never made it, as she almost collided with a pair of the young Sunday school children that darted right in front of her at light speed. The precarious hold she had on the dishes gave way, and both flew from her hands. Sarah managed to snag the one closest to her containing the fruit, but the hapless chicken salad landed on the floor open end down. "Oh no..." Kate moaned.
Sarah heaved a knowing groan. "Calamity Kate rides again."
Ignoring her friend's wry tease, Kate studied the capsized bowl. Hm... it's not all ruined... She grinned. "Don't worry, Sarah. We can still salvage most of this."
"Salvage?" Sarah asked incredulously. "How?"
"Only some of it's touching the floor. That we obviously need to throw away. But what's still in the bowl is still good."
Giggling brightly, Sarah grabbed two more spoons. "I think I know what you have in mind, Katydid."
Very gingerly the two friends rescued the chicken salad a cautious spoonful at a time until most of it was back in the bowl and a thin layer still coated the floor. "I think that had better be it," Kate murmured.
"Don't take this personally, Katydid... but I'll take these two out to the fellowship hall."
"Sure," Kate answered. "Let me hog-tie those two boys first so that you can."
Sarah winked at Kate. "We just need someone to police the traffic coming through this kitchen."
Kate couldn't have agreed with her more. Too many of the young kids used the church hallways as a playground, and they usually didn't watch where they were going. As Sarah took the two dishes out to the table, she scraped the remnants up to throw in the trash and wiped off the floor with a rag. Satisfied that no trace of their mishap existed, Kate continued to help prepare dishes to be taken out to the picnic.
Shortly it was time for lunch. After the pastor led everyone in prayer, they began going through the line. Clay stood behind Kate as they waited, his hands resting on her stomach as if he was protecting the new life growing inside of Kate.
Sarah noticed where Clay's hands rested. "Aren't you showing yet?"
"Not yet," Kate acknowledged with a sigh.
Sarah heaved an echoing sight to match. "You're lucky, Katydid. I'm going to start showing a lot sooner than you will."
"Why?" Clay asked, confused. "Both of you have tiny figures. You shouldn't start showing any sooner than she will when you get pregnant."
"Yeah, but Kate has only one in there." Sarah made a face. "Twins tend to start showing sooner."
Kate blinked with surprise. "Do they run in your family or something that will increase your chances of having them?"
"Not that I know about," Sarah replied.
"Then why - " Kate gasped as she finally read the expression on Sarah's face. "Sarah! Really? Congratulations! When did you find out?"
"Friday."
Kate eyed Will mischievously. "I guess your wife thinks you're all stud now."
Will flushed with embarrassed pride. "Something like that..." he chuckled sheepishly.
Clay frowned. "No fair. Some couples have all the luck."
That is so like a man. Kate glared at her husband. "Just because you want them does not mean I'm going to try to hatch a pair of them."
"Do twins run in your family, hon," Clay asked, "or is it just wishful thinking on my part?"
"You think I'd tell you if they did?" Kate snarked.
"Aw, Kate..."
Kate sighed. "If you want twins, you get to carry one of them."
Clay giggled as Kate patted her stomach smartly. "I'm afraid I don't have the equipment, hon."
"Your loss."
Sarah snickered. "Twins are not just some novelty, Clay. While they may be twice the joy, they are also twice the diapers, twice the headaches, twice the investment, and just twice the effort. I've babysat my share of multiples over the years - including a brand-new set of triplets. Their elder sister had just turned three. Boy, were those four a handful."
"Oh my goodness," Clay breathed. "Identical?"
"Too soon to tell."
Clay sighed as they inched a few more steps forward in the line. "I've just always been fascinated with twins and wanted a set of my own. Are you sure you won't tell me if they run in your family?" he asked his wife.
Kate pinched the bridge of her nose and groaned. "Clayton..."
"Fine," Clay grumbled. "Don't tell me. I'll just have to ask your mother."
"You wouldn't dare!" Kate exclaimed as Sarah giggled.
"Kate," Will shook his head. "If you really believe that, you're either in denial or you don't know your husband as well as you think you do."
"Wishful thinking," Kate whispered sotto voce to Will.
Clay's eyes lit up. "Does this mean you do have twins in your family?" he asked hopefully.
Kate raised her eyebrow. "Now why would you come to that conclusion?"
"If you didn't have them in your family, you'd just admit it," Clay reasoned. "But since you're being especially obstinate, I'm guessing that you do. Since that doesn't guarantee twins, you figure you're better off keeping it to yourself. Am I right?"
"How'd you know?" Kate asked, the dry tone of her voice indicating that she was ready to give him a hard time. "Like you say, I don't want you to be disappointed by how God chooses to populate our family. You know He's the one in control of how many more we have and how many at a time."
Clay's eyes narrowed. "Sarcasm is not your best suit."
"Maybe some days I just prefer to be unpredictable," she retorted. Kate looked him solidly in the eye, knowing that she hadn't told him anything but the truth.
Fortunately either Clay did not realize how truthful she had actually been, or else was willing to overlook it for now. "Believe me, honey, you are that." Clay snuggled close in a warm embrace. "You're just the right balance between comfortably predictable and surprisingly quirky."
"Really?" Kate asked, eyeing him warily.
"Yeah. Offbeat enough to keep me interested and on my toes, but normal enough to keep me sane."
That sounds like how I feel about him, Kate mused. Again she chose to tease. "Brave man, daring to call me 'normal' when that's a term I've never used for myself."
Clay chuckled. "That would be me... your own quirky and offbeat husband."
"And I like you that way." Kate turned back to Sarah. "So when are your little ones due?"
"Early April," Sarah told her, "unless they decide to take
them sooner. The doctor figures that we probably conceived shortly after we got
back from
Kate whistled as Clay shook his head sharply. "Dang, you two don't fool around, do you?"
"Um, honey," Clay whispered, holding back his laughter. "I think fooling around is what got them pregnant in the first place."
Get me on a technicality... Kate groaned as the other married couple grinned at her. "That's not what I meant, ya goof."
Clay bit his lip impishly. "I know... but I couldn't resist." Smiling at Will and Sarah, he went on with that discussion. "Do you want to know whether you're having boys, girls, one of each...?"
"I want to know," Sarah stated firmly, "because that way it's easier to buy what we need for them. Will wants to be surprised. He's kind of old-fashioned that way."
"That's right." Will nodded.
"They already know the gender of their child," Sarah told her husband sweetly.
Will raised an eyebrow at Sarah. "That's because God snitched."
Kate clapped a hand over her mouth to hold back the snicker that wanted to
explode into full-blown laughter. 'God snitched'... that's a new one.
Clay leaned over next to Kate's ear to whisper to her. "We're going to have to remember that - your mom'll love it."
"No kidding," Kate agreed. "So how are you choosing names? Pick two name combos for each gender, and if you get a mixed bag draw from a hat?"
Sarah raised an eyebrow. "Or not."
"Aw..."
"If we get one of each, I was going to suggest Bonnie and
Clay and Kate laughed at Sarah's quick wit. "Cute, Sarah. Any other famous or infamous duos you're considering?"
Snorting not-so delicately, Sarah rolled her eyes. "I was being facetious."
"If I were having twin boys," Kate mused, "I would have too much fun naming them David and Jonathan. Those two were brothers in the heart."
"Nice," Clay replied. Apparently Kate had at least speculated on the "what-if" possibility that twins might be in her future. No - their future. He wondered if she knew something that he didn't. "Girls?"
Kate shrugged. "I figured I'd cross that bridge if I ever came to it. That choice of boy names for a set of twins is just too perfect in my eyes."
Eager to see this line of conversation continue, Clay asked his wife the next question. "What if we had one of each?"
"I don't know, honey - I haven't thought that far."
Clay blinked with surprise. "Then why do you have the boy names?"
"Because the story's perfect!" Kate explained. "Names mean things. You can pick a name just because it's pretty if you want, but if you know the root and meaning behind the name they take on special significance. Sarah and I would know. We've researched our own names."
"Do you know what mine means?" Clay asked.
Kate winced. She had looked it up once, and wasn't really sure that it did him any justice. "Not off the top of my head..."
Sensing that she was dodging the question, Clay resolved to look it up in the book himself later.
Will glanced at Kate. "All right, so what does yours mean?"
"Kathryn means 'pure', and of course Joy is obvious," Kate answered, "so my name means 'pure joy'."
"Pretty."
Clay smiled. "I think it describes you perfectly, hon. Sarah?"
Sarah explained her own name, knowing that while the others may have known the translation for her first name, few would know it for the second. "Sarah Caelin means 'beautiful princess'."
Will grinned. "Doesn't it fit her?"
"So," Clay snickered, "when you call her 'Princess', you're not that far off."
"Yeah." Finally up at the food table, Will and Sarah grabbed their table settings. "Glad we're finally here. I'm starving."
Kate grabbed a pair of table settings, handing the second set to Clay. "You should be past the contagious stage, hon, but until you finally get that clean bill of health from Doctor Gates..."
"Here's to hoping that tomorrow's appointment brings a good word..." Clay sighed.
"Good word?" Sarah asked.
"No more typhoid," Clay said hopefully.
"Hear, hear."
Will's eyes lit up. "Oo - chicken salad."
Sarah and Kate whirled around at Will's declaration, seeing as he scooped a massive portion of Sarah's chicken salad onto a slice of bread that had been provided. Immediately Kate began to snicker, and Sarah gave her a sharp elbow in the side.
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The next morning at the supermarket
"I tell you, Darlene, that's her," the first woman's voice hissed.
"No way, Miriam," the second woman disagreed in return. "She looks so plain. His wife is a lot prettier than that."
"Dare me, and I'll prove that she is."
Sorting through the packages of hamburger at the meat counter, Kate snickered under her breath. Obviously some celeb's poor wife had been spotted among the aisles and was being scrutinized and subjected to the speculation of his fans.
"Excuse me."
Kate blinked at hearing the first woman's voice just over her shoulder. Oh yeah, she recalled. I am a celeb's wife. Nice detective work, Einstein. I think your IQ just dropped ten points right there. Kate turned around to face the middle-aged woman, holding back the sigh she felt. One of these days she would finally have a peaceful trip at the store... but not today. "Yes, can I help you?"
"Are you Clay Aiken's wife?" Miriam asked.
"I am Kate Aiken, and yes, Clay and I are married," Kate answered, subtly defending her identity as an individual. While she never disputed the importance of her role as Clay's wife, Kate knew that who she was as a person was based on more than just her relationships.
By now the second woman, Darlene, had joined the first. "Tell us. Are you excited being married to Clay Aiken?"
Egads, starstruck. Kate had never understood how some people got so wrapped up in their fandom that they ate, drank, slept, daydreamed, et cetera, Clay. The first time she had been on stage with him and had heard some fans screaming at him, it was all she could do not to burst into helpless giggles. Then again, she had giggled at Grease, too... While she agreed that he was special and even sexy, she felt that some of the fans went a little overboard with their enthusiasm. But Kate knew how much Clay valued all of his fans, so she ordered herself to stay polite enough to give the women a reasonable answer. "Are either of you ladies married?"
"We both are," they nodded.
"You happy?"
The two nodded again, but it was Darlene who replied. "Very. Bob is such a wonderful man. I am so lucky to have him."
Kate smiled. "You sound excited to be his wife."
Darlene gushed. "Oh, yes."
"It's the same way for me," Kate told them. "Am I excited to be married to Clay? Every day. I am blessed to be loved by a compassionate and giving Christian man. He certainly has the most beautiful heart of any man I've ever met. And that's by far not the only thing I love about him." The women squealed, and Kate went on. "But he's still just a man, a regular, flawed human man just as I am a regular, flawed human woman. While I wouldn't give him up for anything or anyone, there are days he drives me crazy. And there are days I drive him crazy too. Mood swings, enough said. But in the end, we're blessed to be in each other's lives."
"But..." Miriam paused, "... you're married to Clay Aiken."
Kate cut off a groan before it could escape. She sent a quick request for extra strength and patience heavenward. She had a feeling she would need it all before this conversation was over. "Who he is hasn't changed since before American Idol, ladies. The difference between then and now is how many people have been given the opportunity to see how special he is. I just happen to be the one fortunate enough to have him think I'm special."
"Special enough to make a lifetime commitment to," Darlene responded.
"Yeah..." Kate whispered with a thoughtful twinkle in her eye. Lifetime commitment. Her memory recalled a doctored picture that her mother had found in a contest for altered photographs of Clay. Someone had taken the head shot for the Solitaire single and had altered Clay by adding a minimum of forty years to his appearance. It had intrigued Kate in an odd, unexplainable way as she had studied the photograph at length. She had found herself envying the woman who would be at his side through the years ahead. Now she was that woman, and Kate looked forward to growing old and gray with him... because to her it meant growing wiser and deeper in love with each other. It meant a lifetime of treasured memories together. Old age didn't sound so bad when you looked at it that way.
"You're a lucky lady," Darlene said, recognizing that Kate was in a reflective moment.
"Luck?" Kate shook her head. "I don't believe in luck. I believe in God impacting the lives of all His children, whether they recognize Him at work or not. Coincidence is God working a miracle and signing His name in invisible ink. Some people have just learned to recognize His signature."
Miriam shot a knowing look at her friend, who had a meditative expression on her face. "Sounds like Clay is the lucky one," Miriam stated. "Lucky to have a lady who shares his faith."
"God blessed us both, pure and simple," Kate shrugged, smiling warmly. "He made us 'just right' for each other - then He tapped each of us on the shoulder and said 'Look at my beautiful child over there. I made that person just for you.' Once He had our attention, it was a matter of getting to know each other and finding all the things about the other person that we loved." Kate studied Darlene for a moment. "It sounds like that's what He did for you and Bob, too."
Darlene nodded, her eyes misting. "Yes, he did. Thank you very much, Kate. You're every bit as nice as people say you are on the boards."
Convicted by her words, Kate flushed so deeply that she could feel her
cheeks burning. "Thank you. I appreciate that." You ladies are far
kinder to me than I deserve, considering how I didn't want to deal with this
conversation...
"Tell Clay he's 'still the one' as far as we're concerned."
Kate laughed warmly. Starstruck though they may be, Clay's fans were certainly loyal to him. "I will. Thank you." As the two walked away giggling like schoolgirls, Kate sighed and closed her eyes. Lord, thank you for helping out with that. Looks like I needed it worse than I thought. Please keep giving me measures of grace and understanding. Help me not to be rude to one of his fans because of my own shortcomings and shortsightedness. For all I know, the person I want to snap at just might be the person of the day who needs to hear all about you. Finished with her prayer, Kate returned her attention to the meat counter with a sigh. Seems that God gave her a lot of food for thought lately.
Her cell phone rang, and Kate dug for it in her purse. Noting that her caller ID said the call was from Clay, she answered it with a gentle smile. "Hi, gorgeous."
"Hello there to you too, beautiful," Clay echoed cheerfully, and Kate could imagine the broad grin shining all over his face. "Did I catch you out running errands?"
"I'm raiding the meat counter at the grocery store as we speak," Kate told him. "You saw the planned menu for the week?" she asked.
"I did. You're trying something new this week, I see."
Kate nodded. "One of the recipes that I've raided from who-knows-where over the years. I figure it looked interesting and not too hard to make, so that will be Thursday's evening meal."
"Gotcha," Clay answered.
"Are you done with your doctor's appointment?" Kate asked.
"I am."
Kate waited for him to say more. "What does Doctor Gates have to say?"
Clay took a deep breath. "He'll want to take another sample next week to be sure, but as far as he can tell, my system is typhoid free."
"Woo-hoo!" Kate cheered, performing an excited shuffle in the middle of the aisle. Noticing the people nearby giving her odd looks, she stopped immediately with a deep blush on her face.
Laughing at the sounds of her enthusiasm, Clay went on. "If I knew you would be that excited, I would have tried to find some other good news to give you!"
Wonder what he would say if he saw my victory dance... "Another day, hon. This is good enough for now." Kate squealed and grinned, making Clay giggle all over again. "In fact, that is super. That kind of news calls for a celebration of some sort. Maybe I'll put what I originally planned for tonight's dinner on hold for something special instead."
"Kate honey, this is your good news too," Clay insisted.
"It affected me too, this is true," Kate replied, "but you're the one who really had to watch himself carefully in every little thing he did. Things can finally return to normal for you."
Clay snorted. "As normal as they can be when you're in the public eye..."
I hear you there, Kate mused, remembering the two women who had approached her at the counter. "Is there something extra-special you want me to cook, knowing that I might cook it differently than your mom would?"
Sighing lightly, Clay gave her his answer. "One of my favorites would be special enough for me, honey. You don't have to go to that much work and effort for me."
"Oh, but I want to," Kate whispered. "News like this doesn't come along just every day."
"All right," Clay chuckled. "If you want to make something special that bad, then I'm up for it."
"Any preferences?"
Clay paused in thought for a minute. "Surprise me."
Kate raised an eyebrow. "My my, aren't you trusting! For all you know, I might suddenly decide to crave lobster portabella or something like that."
"Very funny."
"You're right." Kate sighed. "I shouldn't tease like that. I'm sorry, Clay."
"I know you were teasing, honey. That's why I wasn't upset."
"Still..."
Wanting to put a quick end to the current discussion, Clay broke in. "Like you said, I trust you to pick something special that we'll both like and that both of us can actually eat without regrets."
Kate could tell that was Clay's word on the subject. "Anything else about your appointment that you want to share?"
"Even though he gave me a clean bill of health, I'm still on antibiotics a while," Clay shared. "He wants to make sure we've got this mopped up."
"A reasonable precaution," Kate agreed. "That's standard procedure with any number of bugs."
"He also asked me how the vocal therapy was going," Clay reported. "Of course it's too early for me to know the answer to that..."
"Healing takes time, Love," Kate told him gently. "You obviously didn't develop the nodes overnight, they won't go away overnight."
"Yeah," Clay sighed. "I know that... but that doesn't mean I like hearing it."
Kate nodded with gentle understanding. There were few people that could claim an abundance of patience, especially when it came to healing from physical conditions. She decided that she needed to pray for peace and patience for her husband as well as for healing. "Anything else?"
Clay thought for a moment. "Not really. That covers what the doctor and I discussed."
"Where are you off to from here?"
"I have a meeting with management," Clay recalled. "They've done some sniffing and poking around in regards to the variety show idea. Since I've talked about it before, they wanted to see what kind of interest and sponsorship there was out there. They figure that my hands will be full enough on the CDs, if we continue to go forward with them."
"Full enough?" Kate asked, puzzled. "What do you mean?"
"Apparently there's quite the lengthy and complicated process with putting together a CD for the public, and since I was basically given a contract and told simply to show up and sing, there's a lot that goes on behind the scenes that I didn't know anything about. It looks like I'm about to get a crash course..."
Kate snorted. "Show up and sing?"
"Show up to rehearsals, show up to studio time, show up to... you get the idea."
I think I do. "You're saying there's a lot more to this than we know about?"
"That's what I've been told," Clay acknowledged. "It seems that self-producing an album can be quite complicated."
"Complicated," Kate echoed, "but not impossible. If we really decide we want to do this, then I believe that we can. Just because we're newbies doesn't mean we can't do this." She sighed. "We're going to have to learn this complicated process, but I think we can figure it out. If God wants us to do this..."
Clay heard the rest of the unfinished statement. "You're right, honey. If He wants our projects to succeed, then they will succeed." He snorted. "Maybe I should make you my independent production manager. I know the kind of work and persistence you're capable of."
Swallowing nervously, Kate replied slowly. "I've never done anything that big before."
"Neither have I." Clay went on. "If you could handle how many periods of mischievous school children, you could handle this. You'll just be doing a different kind of administration, that's all."
He's got to be joking. "Clay, are you sure - "
"Yes, I am. I'm sure about you, honey, and the gifts that God has given you." Sensing some uncertainty from Kate, Clay chose to wrap up. "Why don't we talk more about this later, once you've gotten the food home and put away? I'm almost at my meeting anyway."
Kate leaned against the meat counter, feeling a little light-headed. "That sounds good."
"I love you."
"Love you too." Kate hung up, shaking her head sharply at Clay's suggestion. Me. Why is he suggesting me to be in charge of this? She shook her head again to clear it so that she could plan for tonight's special celebration meal.
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That evening
Clay walked into the house and sat on the couch with a weary plop. He groaned audibly as he kicked off his shoes and sprawled out.
"That bad?"
Turning an eye to Kate, he heaved a heavy sigh. "They aren't happy with my wanting to record a couple of benefit CDs."
"Of course not," Kate told him as she walked over to him and started to massage his feet one at a time. "They don't make any money from it."
Clay watched her for a moment as she worked on his foot. "You're a brave woman to touch those."
Kate snickered at him with a knowing smirk. "I know full well I'll probably be conning you into doing this for me the farther along I get in my pregnancy."
"Mm, true," he mused thoughtfully. "I'll probably need to give you back massages too, depending on how big you get."
"I hope not that big," Kate sighed.
"Aw..." Clay pretended to pout for a minute before giving her an appreciative eye. "I'm betting you'll still be every bit as beautiful once you finally start showing."
Kate made a face at him. "You sound like you're looking forward to this."
"I am," Clay agreed. Once Kate finished with his feet, Clay smiled at her. "Thanks, hon."
"Sure."
"How's dinner coming?" he asked curiously. "Is it going to taste half as good as it smells?"
"That would be nice." Kate frowned slightly.
"I didn't marry you for your cooking, honey," Clay insisted. "Don't worry if it's not."
"I won't, because there won't be much I can do about it this time. But I do need to get back to work on it." Kate stood, giving her hands a critical look-over. "After I wash up."
"Good plan," Clay told her as she returned to the kitchen. For several moments he debated which was stronger, his desire to stay sprawled out in this relaxed position on the couch, or his desire to talk to Kate while everything was fresh on his mind. The desire to talk ultimately won out, and Clay pulled himself up off the couch with another groan. He could always take it easy after dinner with Kate by his side.
Kate looked up from the sink where she was shaking the water from her hands. "Hon, we have some time before dinner. You could have stayed there a while longer."
"I know," Clay answered, "but I wanted to tell you about the meeting while I'm still remembering everything. And the therapist doesn't want me speaking too loud while I'm trying to heal. He says it's bad for my voice."
"It is," Kate acknowledged. She smiled at him as she returned to her meal preparations. "So after dinner I'll give you the chance to relax since you're in here talking to me now."
"Sounds good to me," Clay replied. "Maybe you can sprawl out on the couch with me."
A light blush coloring her cheeks, Kate agreed. "All right. Other than they don't want you recording your own CDs, how did your meeting go?"
"Apparently I've got some pretty good sponsors for the variety show, especially some who like the idea that it's going to be a family-friendly show." Clay smiled at her. "So financing the project isn't going to be a problem, thankfully. Right now we're trying to find our creative team. Producers, writers, crew - all those who will make everything work on the air. They're still hoping that my voice will be back by the time we go on the air on a regular basis, so that I can sing from time to time. I told them not to count on it."
Kate nodded. "I hope that too, but like you I know not to count on it. We'll just have to wait and see if that's what God has in mind for you, or if He has something else." Trying not to blush under Clay's interested eye, she continued working quietly in their kitchen. "I'm glad to see that there are companies out there still willing to support entertainment that can be watched by entire families. Who do we have so far?"
"I doubt that some of them will surprise you," Clay told her with a wry grin. "McDonald's and Krispy Kreme are two of them."
She snickered. He was right - neither of those two came as a surprise.
"One of the other big ones is Disney," Clay reported. "They want to continue working with me as much as they can."
"Hmm," Kate pretended to ponder. "With Disney as a sponsor, I can't help but wonder what station we're going to be on."
"I wonder," Clay replied dryly, knowing full well that Kate was being a smart-aleck.
"Already Been Cast," she quipped.
Clay laughed warmly. "Nice... Anyway, we're looking at some really good writers and producers, some that know how to write good comedy and still keep it clean."
"That right there," Kate acknowledged, "is a lost art. Good luck finding them."
"Watch me try."
"I know you can." Kate smiled warmly at him. "I believe in you."
"Speaking of believe in you," Clay noted pointedly, "that was the other big topic of discussion, the benefit CDs I want to record. Most of them want nothing to do with it and were trying to discourage me."
Kate made a face. "That figures."
"However, there was one or two of them who took me aside later to encourage me and give me a few tips." Clay's eyes twinkled at the memory. "They could tell that I was serious about it, and they thought that if I was going to do it they might as well help me succeed."
Squawking with excitement, Kate hurried to hug her husband. "That is wonderful!! So a few of them were helping? Who? H-How?"
Clay giggled fondly at her enthusiasm. "The only one you've met is Clive Davis. He told me that you and I and our fellow songwriters wanted to join two organizations as soon as possible, ASCAP and BMI, and then he told his secretary to arrange to have something dropped by the house this afternoon. Was there a delivery of some sort today?"
Kate blinked. That would explain the package in brown paper that had come only hours earlier. She pointed at the package now laying on one of the counters, about the size of a book. "Is that it?"
Without answering her right away, Clay quickly unwrapped the brown paper covering the delivery. Glancing it over, he nodded. "This has to be what he had delivered. It certainly makes sense."
"What is it?"
"A book about self-producing our own recordings," Clay answered. "Assigned reading for both of us, if we're going to get this project off the ground."
Oh goody... Kate thought as she eyed the book. She thought required reading ended when she graduated from college. This, on top of everything else we're going through. Since she wanted the benefit recordings to be a success, Kate vowed that she would find the time to read the book. If Clive Davis was going to be thoughtful enough to send it over, she figured she had darn well better use it.
Kate rubbed her eyes with a sigh as she quickly tried to readjust her sudden change of attitude. It seemed lately that she was just a collection of mood swings, and she really hoped she'd get over it soon. Of course since the baby wasn't due until latter February, Kate knew she was in for a long haul of this... much to her annoyance. Clay needed a wife, not a shrew. She couldn't help noting with irony that her first name matched the lead female's from the production.
"You okay, honey?" Clay asked.
"Of course," Kate responded, avoiding his gaze.
"Look at me when you say that."
Kate looked up into Clay's concerned eyes. "What other advice did you get on the project?"
"Kathryn..." Clay scolded gently. "Don't dodge the subject."
She waved a nonchalant hand. "It's not important, hon. Go on and tell me the rest of what happened."
I really wish she wouldn't shut me out like that, Clay frowned. I wish she would just tell me if something was wrong. Continuing to study her with an odd look in his eyes, he went on. "We're not looking at a short process here. An album can take around 18 months to put out."
"That long?" Kate asked. "And we're wanting to do two of them!"
"I know. I haven't decided if we'd be better off doing them one at a time or simultaneously."
Kate tapped her lips thoughtfully before answering. "I don't see why we can't do as much of it as possible at the same time, as long as we don't get our projects mixed up."
Clay flipped through the pages of the book. "Why don't we skim through this and get a general idea how big of an undertaking this is before we decide? We may decide that one at a time is all we can handle, we may decide that both at once is the way to go."
"Fine with me," Kate answered abruptly.
That was awfully terse - what's eating her? Making a face at her choice of words, Clay stood right beside her. "Kate, what's wrong? One minute you're sweet as sugar, and the next you sound like you're ready to either cry or scream at someone. I almost wish that you would, just so that you would admit something is wrong. Please tell me what's going on, even if your answer is that it's just another pregnancy mood swing!" Kate suddenly burst into tears, and Clay nodded. "Unless you say differently, then I think I just got my answer."
"I don't want to have mood swings," Kate sobbed. "This is a big day for you - you shouldn't have to spend it dealing with me and m-my..."
"What, don't you think you're allowed to have feelings?" Clay asked.
Stomping her foot, Kate slammed the cooking utensil she was using on the counter. "I don't want my feelings to interfere when I'm supposed to be supporting you! I should be able to c-control this and..."
Clay chuckled. "Darlin', you're not perfect, and I'm not expecting you to be. In case you haven't noticed, my moods go all over the place too. I've known WOMEN tougher than I am..."
Kate laughed, even in the midst of her crying. "I'd hardly call that a fault, Clay - in fact I'd go so far as to call it a strength. I like a tender-hearted man, and so do your fans."
"Kathryn... I want you to express your feelings, even if it means you're mad at me for something." Clay searched her eyes to see if he was getting through. "If you don't share your feelings with me, then we're not communicating as well as we can be. We have to be able to communicate if we're going to stay strong as a couple. Even conflict can be good, if it's open conflict."
"All right," Kate murmured. "I'll try..."
"So what prompted today's mood swing, or do you even know?" he asked, gently wrapping his arms around her to encourage more open communication.
With a loud sniffle Kate buried her face into his shoulder and held on to him tightly. "I'm just feeling so overwhelmed by everything - the baby, the typhoid, the nodes, the stuff for Emeline's Hope, the stuff for the benefit CDs..." Her voice trailed off, and Clay knew that she was thinking of other things too. "I want so much to support you and be a solid rock for you, but some days I feel like my foundation has turned to mud. Any day that mud is going to give way, and I won't have the strength to give you what you need."
Clay stroked her hair. "You can't just give all the time, honey, or one day you'll find out you don't have the energy left to give any more. You have to let others give back to you in return. And that's my job, to give to you when you need it. Please let me do it."
"Okay."
Sighing deeply, Clay scowled lightly. "Maybe we are a bit overextended... we might have to see how we're going to manage everything God has given us to work with."
"Yeah..."
"You going to be all right?" Clay asked, glancing down at Kate as she continued to cling to him.
Kate sniffled again. "Yeah. Give me another minute to recover."
I can handle that. Clay smiled as he continued to hold her warmly in his embrace.
It was almost undetectable at first... but little by little Clay noticed the unmistakable odor of something burning. He wrinkled his nose as it slowly grew. "What's that smell?"
"Oh...!" Kate broke from his arms instantly, grabbing for a nearby oven mitt. Yanking a nearby skillet off of its burner, she quickly turned the heat off. "I'm afraid to see how bad it is..."
No sooner than she had pulled back the lid a crack when smoke poured out of the opening. Clay grimaced as she muttered and grumbled underneath her breath. "How bad is it?"
"It's bad," Kate replied. "I think I just ruined dinner." She placed the skillet on a nearby unlit burner and opened the lid farther to get a look at the contents. Her shoulders sagged as she took in the remains of the special main entrée she had chosen for this evening. "Perfect."
Shaking his head quietly, Clay bit his lip to hold back his reaction to this
development... laughter. He knew that Kate would not take it well right now.
Maybe later, after she had calmed down, they could both have a good laugh. I
should have suggested this in the first place... he mused. "Not a big
deal, honey. We'll just hose it down, see how much
"But Clay," Kate protested as he placed his gentle hands on her shoulders, "I wanted to fix you something really nice for dinner."
"Another time," Clay soothed. "Maybe the next time we have friends or family over you can cook something really nice, and I'll help you so that you're not so overwhelmed." Seeing the first sign of relief on her face, he continued. "Nothing is so bad that it can't be fixed or ignored, hon. Tonight we're going to ignore that," he pointed at the smoldering meat, "and someone else is going to fix dinner for us. Tomorrow I'll let you get back into the kitchen - and I'll try not to distract you this time."
"You didn't distract me," she answered. When Clay cocked his head questioningly, Kate reconsidered. They had been in the middle of a deep heart-to-heart conversation when Kate had lost track of what was happening with the meat... and it was during their embrace that things had started to heat up. "All right... maybe you did, just a bit."
"A bit?" Clay huffed, pretending to be insulted.
"Okay, maybe more than just a bit."
Clay rolled his eyes. "Looks like I'm losing my touch, if I'm only distracting you 'just a bit.' I'm going to have to work on my distraction techniques..."
Kate snickered. "Your distraction techniques? And what, pray tell, are your distraction techniques?"
"For me to know," he waggled his eyebrows, "and perfect on you later."
"Oo," she cooed. "I think I should be worried about that."
"You should." Clay put the lid back on the burnt offering that used to be dinner. "Let's go."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The next evening
Much as he had the day before, Clay sank onto the couch with a heavy sigh. Lord,
I know you see and know all things, he thought, but what in the world
did you have in mind when you chose me for all these things? Some days I
wonder if I have enough faith or strength or talent or... why me? What is it
that you see and I don't?
As much as the previous day had shown promise, this one had shown
frustration. One of the producers they had been pursuing chose another project.
His vocal therapy session had been full of new techniques that had gone
completely over his head. Then to make matters worse, he had been stopped and
ticketed by one of
"Hey, honey," Kate greeted. "Didn't hear you come in."
"Sorry," Clay grunted a half-hearted response as he opened the refrigerator.
"That's not a - " Kate broke off as a container holding some of last night's leftovers fell out of the refrigerator and landed on the floor. The lid came open, spilling the dish's contents onto the floor.
Clay stood there seething in silence as last night's meal pooled at his feet. "Next time," he growled, "put the lid on tight and this won't happen."
Kate blinked with surprise at her husband. "Hon, you know I usually do."
"Evidently it wasn't tight enough!" he snapped.
Still in shock at his slowly building anger, Kate shook her head. "Yesterday you didn't expect me to be perfect. Today you are telling me I can do better?"
"This isn't a big thing, Kate," Clay insisted, the volume of his voice increasing. "This is just putting the lid of the food on tight! And you didn't do it!"
"If you are so worried about it being done right," Kate retorted, "then do it yourself! You're the one who brought the leftovers in the house, sat them on the counter, and left them there! I just happened to see them on a trip through and thought I was doing a good thing putting them away." Frowning, she shot an annoyed glare at him. "Looks like it wasn't good enough."
"Kate!" Clay yelled. "I - " Abruptly he turned and left the room.
Kate heard the slamming of the door to the house and knew that Clay had left to vent and cool down. She returned to her work in the kitchen in hopes that her wait would be short. After all, he was the one who started it.
Five minutes went by, then ten. Is he still angry? Kate
wondered. What did I do to deserve that in the first place? The question
sobered her instantly. What did I do?
The time continued to crawl with no sign of Clay's return, and Kate began to worry. Maybe she really had done something wrong. Maybe she had somehow deeply hurt or offended him. Maybe something had happened to him, since he had left the house without any sort of guard or backup. He hadn't even taken his cell - it was still laying over in plain sight on the coffee table.
Leaving dinner preparations exactly where she had left off, Kate went over
to the couch and sat down. There was very little more she could do until he
returned. She continued to reflect on the events that had occurred between
Clay's return and his departure. It really didn't matter what she had or hadn't
done wrong - they had fought, they had yelled at each other. And he was very
likely still angry. She hated it when they fought, and even now she felt
herself dissolve into anguished tears. Lord... forgive me for fighting with
Clay. Please let him forgive me... he has to forgive me. Please...
As Clay slammed the door of the house behind him, he dug in his pocket for his car keys. Still growling and grumbling, he climbed in his car for a drive to get some fresh air. Noting that he had a full tank of gas, Clay was relieved as he realized that he wouldn't have to stop. Good thing - he had neither bodyguard nor cell phone with him. He was on his own for now.
Over the next hour Clay drove all over
When Clay finally returned home, he immediately started looking for Kate. He found her crying on the couch in the living room, lying on her side curled up in a tight little ball. Filled with guilt and remorse, he knelt down in front of the couch and laid a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Kate honey..." he began quietly. "I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too, Clay."
"You didn't deserve that at all, hon. I just had a really bad day... and when that happened, it was just the final straw, and I blew." Clay bit his lip at the fresh, vivid memory. "I couldn't have picked a dumber thing to fight with you about."
Kate glanced up at him through her tears. "It was a silly thing for us to fight about, wasn't it?"
"Yeah." Clay convinced Kate to sit up, and he pulled her close into his arms.
"You said you had a bad day," Kate sniffled. "What happened?"
"That doesn't matter right now," Clay insisted. "Not until I've finished apologizing to you."
"Finished?"
Clay broke the tight embrace to take her hands. "Will you forgive me for yelling at you like that?"
"Of course," Kate responded instantly. "Will you forgive me?"
"Always." Clay smiled. "Can we pray about it?"
"Yes." Keeping a hold of each other's hands, the two of them prayed to God for forgiveness... both as individuals and a couple, thanking him for the sacrifice by the One who made unconditional forgiveness such a free and marvelous gift. Before finishing, they thanked Him for each other and asked that He continue to make them strong in faith and in their relationship.
As soon as Clay opened his eyes, he knew he was hungry for something entirely different from what Kate had been preparing earlier in the kitchen... and from the expression on Kate's face, so was she. Dinner could wait. Clay reached a tender hand to her cheek, infusing his caress with all the love and gentleness that he felt for her. Kate closed her eyes and basked in his touch for several minutes, until her heart led her to return some of the love. Taking hold of the hand on her face, Kate held it still to turn sweet kisses into its palm. A slow smile turned the corners of Clay's mouth as she continued to kiss the palm of his hand. Careful not to disturb her affections, Clay slid closer to his wife on the couch. His motion was enough to catch her attention, for no sooner than he was next to her when she looked up at him with a soft, inviting gaze. The look in Kate's eyes resonated deeply within Clay, and he felt his breath begin to shallow and catch in his lungs.
Drawn to share even deeper expressions of love with his wife, Clay braced her face with his other hand. He leaned close and placed kisses painstakingly all over her face, brushing his lips lightly over one spot while leaving a moist and lingering kiss on another. Kate released a long, slow sigh as she relished each individual kiss and the trail of his breath on her face before once again returning some of the affection.
"Kate," Clay moaned quietly as he felt her gentle nibbles on his neck. "I love what you're doing, but I'm going to have a lot of explaining to do to my managers tomorrow if you leave a mark there."
"What's to explain?" Kate asked. "We are married." She glanced up at him. "Considering that we're expecting too, there's nothing left to explain."
Mm, true. Clay thought about that one for another minute. "You left one on me the last time, hon. Maybe tonight I should leave one on you instead," he teased.
"All right by me," Kate agreed. "But I'm sure you can find a much better place to leave it."
Clay's eyes lit up at the overt innuendo. "That sounds like an invitation if I ever heard one."
"Bring it on," Kate purred.
"All right..." Clay smirked.
Kate briefly shook her head. "Hold on - I haven't finished giving you yours."
His eyes widening, Clay gaped at her. "You're leaving one on purpose?"
"Yep." She shot him a mischievous look. "Consider it payback, sweet-cheeks."
"What! Payback for what?"
Kate shrugged with just an eyebrow. "I haven't decided."
Why you little... Clay smiled wryly at her impishness as she continued to nuzzle at the same spot on his neck. The way it was feeling, she was leaving him a real doozy. He would have to check it out later - much later. In the meantime, he wanted to enjoy every moment of this and figure out what delightful way he could torture her in response.
Before Clay could implement any of his devious ideas, Kate captured his lips with her own. As the kiss progressed and built in passion, Clay could feel the hunger for the two of them to meld in her kiss. The urgency of his own desire stirred to answer, and Clay deepened the kiss farther still.
Their hormones in full swing, the couple began to exchange affections that are best shared between husband and wife. The deep emotions from their earlier argument, reconciliation, and prayers were now manifesting themselves differently, in deep expressions of love and total intimacy.
Finally at saturation from a lengthy stretch of coming together in mind, body, and soul, Clay and Kate continued to hold each other in a warm embrace. Clay gently traced the features of her face with a finger as they gazed deeply into each other's eyes with contentment, not saying a word for a long time. An old saying stated that the more passionate the fight, the more passionate the make-up. The two of them hated to fight with each other, but neither could deny the depth of the intimacy that often followed their reconciliations. After a few particularly hard-wrought fights, Clay had still felt the solidity of that connection even the next day. Feeling the cool air of the latening evening on his overheated skin, he knew that the love they had shared tonight would make the next day better for both of them.
It was Kate that ended up breaking the silence. "In a sense getting back to the topic that started the argument in the first place, I need to clean up the kitchen. How much of what I was trying to work on for dinner do we actually want tonight, and how much of it do we want to save for another day?"
"Um..." Clay answered, trying in vain to remember what was supposed to be on tonight's menu. "What time is it?" he asked at last.
Kate looked up at the nearby clock and grimaced. "Later than we intended on having dinner."
Clay winced. The two of them really did need to eat something, especially since Kate was eating for two. She sure hadn't seemed to gain that much weight thus far (she was only about 9-10 weeks along), and even Clay felt she could stand to put a few pounds on her slender frame. Maybe as Joseph continued to grow and develop she would finally start adding the weight needed for both of them to be healthy. "What were we having for dinner?" Clay asked sheepishly.
"Uh..." Kate paused to recall, and Clay laughed merrily at her reaction.
"If it's that memorable," Clay teased, "then why don't we order a pizza for tonight? That'll give us time to put ourselves and our kitchen back together before the delivery man arrives."
In the interest of the late time, Kate agreed to his suggestion with a sigh. Hopefully tomorrow would be better for both of them. "Two ruined meals in one week..." she complained. "Where is my head?"
Snickering lightly, Clay chose not to comment. With everything going on for both of them, he was surprised that she didn't ruin more. They were going to have to start organizing and simplifying their lives this week, or else it would only get worse when Joseph arrived the middle of February. Provided that he waited that long for his debut.
Clay made the call to give Kate the opportunity to make herself presentable, and while Kate started cleaning up food and supplies in the kitchen Clay did the same with himself. He joined her in the kitchen to finish cleaning up the mess, and with both of them working they had everything back in shape by the time the pizza delivery man arrived. Clay paid for the pizza and brought it to where Kate had set the table, giving her a fond kiss on the cheek. "Did you want to have another go-around with the baby name book tonight?" he asked as they sat down.
Kate gave it some thought. Rather than tackle the whole section of boy names at once, they had decided to tackle a letter at a time until they had gone through them all or found the perfect choice of middle name for their son. "We can do the R's tonight."
As Clay and Kate worked on their pizza, they opened up to the section of the book with the 'R' names. "We could always call him Joseph Racham," Kate suggested. "Racham means 'compassionate'."
Clay made a face and shook his head. "Um, no. Hey,
"Well well..." Kate turned the page to find 'Rawleigh' and its meaning. "It has English origins, and it means 'deer meadow'."
"Definitely not..." Clay snorted.
"Say, here's your dad's name - Ray. French origins... means 'kingly' or 'royal'. English origins... says that it's a short form of Rayburn or Raymond." Kate skimmed ahead on the page to find the meanings of the long forms of Ray. Suddenly her eyes widened. Shaking slightly, Kate quietly closed the book and put it down to the side.
What the... Confused by her reaction, Clay studied her. "What's wrong? Wh-why did you close the book? We've only just started the R's."
"I already know what we want to name our son," Kate answered, her voice barely audible.
"Oh really?" Clay asked. "Care to clue me in?"
Kate swallowed, still deeply affected by what she read. "Clay...
Raymond means 'mighty', or 'wise protector'. Your father protected you... and
our wise, mighty God protected us in
Clay paled as the parallels tied themselves together in a way that neither of them could ever have imagined. No matter how hard a person tried, they could never out-think or out-plan God. The evidence was in their own very lives for all to see and marvel. "You're right, honey," he whispered hoarsely. "We're done looking in the book."
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9