Checklist for all you obsessives
The first Steven Tyler 
page on the net

#1)You light candles, and whisper curses on Steven and Teresa's anniversary.

#2)You buy an Aerostar Van, just because you like the name.

#3)You send Taj, Chelsa, Mia, and Liv birthday and Christmas presents because, after all, they will be your step-children soon.

#4)You have spent the last year of your life constantly writing letters to the government, trying in vain to get March 26th declared a national holiday.

#5)You've already picked out your wedding dress.

#6)For some bizarre reason, your wardrobe matches Teresa's wardrobe EXACTLY.

#7)Your collection of concert stubs takes up the greater portion of your room.

#8)You have a box containing locks of Steven's hair, and not all of it is from of his head.

#9)You have saved all your money to buy a small country, and now that you are Queen/King you have immediately re-named it Aeroland. Dream On is the national anthem, the wings logo is on the flag, and all your speeches end with "Give me Steven, or give me Death !"

#10)Brad Pitt expresses his desire for you, and you turn him down. You ae saving yourself for Steven.

#11)You have dedicated a special room in your house to be your Aerosmith Room.

#12)Your house is painted in Pink, Milk Cow Blues, and Darkness.

#13)Your speed dial is hooked up to various radio stations, just in case of a contest.

#14)Ticketmaster is giving you discounts

#15)You know the names of all the roadies, and they know you on sight.

#16)When Steven hurt his knee, you purposely broke your own so that you could truly "feel his pain"

#17)You're quickly flipping past channels on your tv and are able to spot Steven- not by sight, but by a random sound while the interviewer, not Steven, was on camera

#18)Every time you pass a Godiva chocolate box/store/wrapper you proudly announce to anyone nearby that "Steven likes their chocolate"

#19)You have discarded your former religion (or lack of one) to become a full fledged 'Tylerian'

#20)You failed an entire term of English due to lapsing into intricate fantasy's when the book "Arrowsmith" was mentioned

#21) The Harley-Davidson wings just seem like big ol' rip-offs

#22) When Steven's unsure of some bizarre fact of Aerosmith history, he calls YOU.

#23) You have yet to hear of a stadium in the world you have not visited in order to see Aerosmith

#24) You bought up the house next to Steven's, and haven't stopped looking out one of it's windows in months.

#25) You've started a "six degrees of Aerosmith" game.

#26) You spend at least 10 hours shopping for a new outfit every time you're going to see an Aerosmith concert

#27) ... and you've been to every concert on the Nine Lives tour thus far.

#28) You have restraining orders out against you from every rock critic that has ever dared to call Aerosmith less than perfect

#29) You've missed a lot of school because of the tour... in fact, you haven't been in class for 25 years now...

#30) You scream "man-stealer!" at anyone with the name "Teresa"

#31) You prefix all positive words with "aero". Instead of saying "I am happy" you say "I am aero-happy!" Because really, what is happiness without Aerosmith?

#32) You feel a sense of pride whenever you see Mia or Liv in the media

#33) Your friends refuse to walk into your room due to their fear and disgust over your super-sized version of the naked poster of Steven from the Livin' on The Edge video that you use as wallpaper.

#34) Whenever you hear about a restaurant Steven has eaten in, or a hotel he has stayed in, or a rest stop he has peed in, you write it down just in case you are ever "passing through" inner Mongolia and happen to spot it. You then book plane tickets.

#35) You're getting your own little 15-minutes of fame due to Aerosmith - a lot of people in the media are beginning to refer to you by name- "so-and-so, the Steven Tyler stalker!"

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