LIVING ON PURPOSE
By Rainah Simmons

At the age of 25, I feel like I have endured quite a bit. Yet, the greatest thing that my experience's have taught me, is to live on purpose and in purpose, instead of by accident or by chance.

As a freshman in college, I took a chance and got involved with a young soldier, and I ended up pregnant. We decided to get married, but our marriage ended, because I walked out the door, and gave up on my young, confused and hurting husband. He did a lot of things wrong, but when I left, I turned my back on God, not on him, and I just recently came to this conclusion.

Fast forward to three years, and I was doing well. I graduated from college, purchased a townhouse, and had a good job, with a pretty good starting salary. There was only one problem, I was out of church, out of fellowship with other believers, out of touch with family, and most importantly, out of the will of God. I was soon befriended by a young man, and by being out of touch with the things of God, I was vulnerable to the snares of the enemy. If I were in tune with the Holy Spirit, I would have never entertained his advances. I became pregnant, and was severely persecuted for keeping the baby.

With the exception of God and fellow believers, everyone else turned their backs on me (including the young man), and turned their noses up to me. I even got laid off of my job, during the third month of my pregnancy, but God was not through with me yet.

After having the baby, and now raising two little girls alone, I am still learning to trust and lean on God everyday. God is not through with me yet. I am back in church, me and my ex-husband are discussing reconciling, and I'm in the process of getting a promotion at my new job that God gave to me when I was 8 months pregnant!

Now I still struggle, but I am beginning to view the struggles differently. Like Lena Horne says, "It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it."

Some days I have to bend my knees, or grit my teeth and bear some things, other days I have to know that when I am weak, He is strong! I know that God is not through with me yet! I will overcome! I am more than a conqueror because everyday

I have decided to live on purpose, and in the purposes of God.

Rainah Simmons is from Goldsboro, NC. A graduate of NC Central University, with a degree in English-Media Communications, currently working in Graphic Arts. Rainah has two daughters, Chynah Ashleigh and Rubie Micaiah. She enjoys dancing, reading, and writing.