All eyes are on the bride, because naturally she's so gorgeous!
The bride's outfit is the most complicated because it can potentially have so many pieces to it! A good idea is to make a list to tick off (in fact, two, one for as you acquire it all, the second to cross it all off as you are dressing on the wedding day! I got halfway down the street in the wedding cars when I realised I'd forgotten my petticoat!!!)
Here is a suggested helpful list (you can cut and paste):
shoes
stocking/hosiery (get two pairs - you may need an emergency pair on the day in case of ladders)
suspender belt
corsetry (bra) - you can get an all in one torsolette which includes stocking hooks, eliminating the need for a separate suspender belt
underwear (panties)
petticoat (slip)
hooped net skirt (if your dress requires it)
dress (or suit, caftan, other traditional cultural wedding garment)
veil (or hat, headdress)
tiara or floral headwear
tiny handbag or purse (for handkerchief, face powder and lipstick)
horseshoe and other good luck charms
garter (optional)
gloves (optional)
jewellery
Think about what you or your relations or friends might already have and this might also cover the "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue" superstition. As well as bring you good karma and fond wishes on your wedding day. Imagine how proud your Mother would be as you walk down the aisle wearing her own wedding gloves, or your Grandmother as you carry her tiny pearl beaded evening bag.
I wore a pale blue garter which an Aunt made for me, 30 year old ivory and taupe Italian court shoes with kitten heels which had belonged to a friend's mother (gorgeous timeless shoes, I love Italian shoes ... but I digress!), borrowed my Mums jewel set which Dad had given her when they were courting, my new dress which I had had altered for a better fit (began life as a creme evening dress with potential) and a veil that I had remade myself.
My veil had been an unused second veil of my sister-in-laws, it had three tiers and I took two off, removed the head band and after changing the colour from white to off white with folk art spray colour (tea dying works too if you have more time) and regathering the top so it had more flounce, I sewed it on to a comb with my (artificial, but who could tell?) floral head piece and a piece of creme satin ribbon. This enabled my hairdresser to create a beautiful hair style for me, and slide the veil on to the top of my hair at the back without crushing it. So the veil could sit there all day and night without giving me a headache (as alice bands are wont to do!).
If you are reasonably proficient at using a needle and thread, and have time, you may want to explore the idea of making your own veil, bridal purse or other items. I saw some excellent patterns from Vogue© for veils and purses, even a bridal train pattern and glove pattern. You could even make your own dress but that would take a supreme effort and you'd need help for fitting if you don't have a dressmakers dummy! Don't let your fiancé loose with pins :-)
Obtaining a wedding dress way ahead of the wedding day can have pitfalls. It may no longer fit perfectly if you lose/gain weight or change shape. So people recommend test fitting at 3 months, 2 months, and again at 2 weeks before. Then be very careful you don't gain or lose weight in those last two weeks. I suggest staying away from anything which might cause bloating, remembering that your tummy might be more sensitive from pre-wedding jitters! Coffee, cola, booze and high salt foods are wise to avoid.
Some lucky brides have an heirloom family wedding dress to wear. For the rest of us, there are new dresses to buy, you can hire one, get it made at a dress maker or talented relation, sew it yourself or buy second hand or even borrow. (See also, the resources page on this site). Don't expect a perfect fit when you find your dream dress, most dresses need tiny alterations at least, to look truly perfect - the female form comes in myriad designs!
Be prepared to try on lots of different dresses, your dream dress may not look so great after all - remember the movie "four weddings and a funeral"? Meringue dresses? I'd always wanted a fishtail dress, but I have a long body and short legs - I was so sad when I saw what the long dreamt about dress style looked like on me in bridal shop mirrors!
When looking for bridal shoes remember how long you will be wearing them (all day and well into the night, dancing in them too). Really high heeled or tight shoes could nag you all day and perhaps end up causing you pain. If you have a favourite comfortable pretty pair of shoes you could get them recovered (also resoled) to match your dress. If you're getting married in summer you can wear a pair of those wonderfully glam 70's inspired strappy high heeled sandals. These also have a height advantage - wide heels are easier to walk on in the high heels stakes. With sandals, you'll need "nude toe" hosiery and/or an excellent pedicure and leg de-fuzz and possibly a light application of fake tan (professional and done several days before).
Tiaras look gorgeous - you can even get them with co-ordinating jewellery. They go great on natural flatheads like me! However I realised that the last three weddings I'd been involved with had all had brides wearing tiaras so in the interests of individuality I quashed the idea and went for something different.
After speaking with my hairdresser, we decided a rear mounted veil with artificial flowers was the way to go.
Bear in mind when choosing headwear that you don't have to cover your face with the veil as you walk down the aisle (hang tradition!) and the heavier and longer your head wear design the more uncomfortable your head and scalp may become as the day wears on.
If you want a long veil, go for a single layer, or one which has a second collar length layer - this keeps down the weight of the veil hanging from your head. You could also have the detachable second veil layer if you want your face veiled for the aisle walk, or to have a long veil in your wedding photographs - your bridesmaid can remove the second veil layer for you after the ceremony and photographs, leaving you with a considerably lighter weight on your head for the rest of your special day. Hey, who says you even need a veil ? A floral headpiece or tiara on its own can look equally stunning!
There are a variety of fantastic dressmaking patterns available for bridal headwear. Any sewing store should have pattern books which will usually have a bridal section.
If you can easily handle scissors, a needle & thread and a hot glue gun, you can purchase some extra wide tulle, wash the stiffening out (line dry, do not tumble dry it), hem it, glue or sew hem decoration on (beads, pearls, lace or embroidery) and gather the top together with loose tacking stitches. Don't attempt machine gathering unless you use hat elastic - because tulle rips easily. Glue and sew the gathered head piece to a hair comb (clear plastic is best, unless you've found something special like gold or pearl tone). You can attach a wide piece of ribbon or intertwined artificial flowers. If you can't find the colour of tulle you want, you can experiment with dye (tea dye gives antique white or creme) or craft paint. Beware that craft paint is flammable, as is tulle anyway, so don't get too close to any candelabra or your veil may catch fire, like mine did! (Thank you James for saving it and me from serious damage!)
Alice band styles can give you a headache if you're not used to them or they're too tight and you can't take them off before the end of the day because they leave your hairstyle dented! If you don't want to wear your veil to the reception, go for a comb style so you can remove it. A separate floral piece stops you from feeling cranium naked.
Fresh flower head dresses look gorgeous. They may also wilt if the weather is hot. You can't really tell what they'll look like until the wedding day for obvious reasons.
Ordinary styled bra, push up bra v. comfy.
Engineering comes in when your dress is a halter neck, strapless or backless.
Corset bras may become uncomfortable because they finish at the waist and tend to "bite". Torsolettes are more comfy because of the length, but you should ensure you can actually sit down when you're strapped in and remember that you have to leave room for food!
If you want to wear one of those plunging backed dresses stick on breast support (as used by ballroom dancers) is available. You may have to shop around to find it, but I've been assured that it even works securely for heavy breasted women (however I'm sceptical - I'd say give stick-ons a trial run before purchasing a daring dress!)
Trains (make ass look bigger), Garter, handbag, charms, gloves, jewellery.
Garters and good luck charms (such as horse-shoes) can be bought at wedding supply stores, dept stores and newsagencies and stationery stores (usually bundled in with wedding stationery, strangely enough).
They are also very easy to make. ( link) You can also borrow them. I carried my mother's wedding day horseshoe - vintage 1958, and another which she sewed for me specially including tiny blue forget-me-knot flowers, covering two superstitions there! An aunt made my garter, also (pale) blue, thereby doubly covering the superstition.
A drawstring bag is simple to sew - if you're having your dress made, you can get it made up out of the same fabric as your dress from the scrap pieces at probably little or no extra cost.
Or go shopping. Anywhere that sells handbags will have some tiny creme and white models, perhaps even gold silver and pastels! You'll find a smorgasbord of choices in texture, fabric and colour shades.
When deciding, bear in mind what you will be carrying on the day and try to keep that to a minimum. [Suggest: face powder compact (essential if you usually get a shiny nose, don't believe make-up people when they say "this product will control oil, your nose won't shine"!), lipstick, handkerchief, spare pantyhose or stockings].
Big department stores, wedding supply stores and some lingerie stores carry wedding gloves. There are also sewing patterns about.
Paste, Glitter co, Myers, boutiques. If you're lucky enough to travel or live nearby, I found the international markets in Honolulu and Mongkok night markets in Hong Kong great places to buy quality fake jewels. It's a good idea to test wear any earrings, bracelets and necklaces for the drop-off factor and with your wedding day perfume in case they cause soreness or inflammation.
You can e-mail me
shwtrbride@geocities.com
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