The Policies of D.A.N.G.E.R.



© 2000 Not Fish Productions This site was designed by Jimmy with a little help from Schmick.	Curious to know the principals that build the foundation for D.A.N.G.E.R.? Well, this is the place. Schmick and Michael Selby have put together a book for all D.A.N.G.E.R. personnel called The Policies of D.A.N.G.E.R. It is found on the nightstand of every room in the D.A.N.G.E.R. compound. Here we give you various excerpts every month to wet your appetites.
	Pg. 256 To: D.A.N.G.E.R. members Re: Laundry There has been much confusion, gnashing of teeth, and massive head trauma based on the D.A.N.G.E.R. policy on laundry. To clear up that confusion, the rules will be concisely stated here. Whites may only be done on Mondays. Socks however may only be done on Thursdays after 5 p.m. If white socks have colored stripes, they may only be washed every other Wednesday between 1 and 2:15 in the afternoon. If the sock stripes are multicolored, they must be washed every third Monday from 10:45 to 11:27 before the noontime hour. This is the case, except in September and April, when they must be washed on the second Tuesday of the month between 0846 and 0942, sharp. Shirts of the short sleeve variety must be washed in the mountain streams of Nepal, for a springtime fresh smell. Long sleeve shirts may only be washed in the dishwasher, on the gentle cycle. Pants may not be washed. Undergarments may only be worn once and then must be incinerated. Dry cleaning is punishable by death.