Movie Quotes (R)

*Rainmaker, The

Rudy (Matt Damon): My father hated lawyers all his life. He wasn't a great guy, my old man, he drank and beat up my mother. He beat me up too. So, you might think I became a lawyer just to piss him off. But you'd be wrong. I wanted to be a lawyer ever since I read about the Civil Rights lawyers in the 50s and 60s and the amazing uses they found for the law. They did what a lot of people thought was the impossible. They gave lawyers a good name and so I went to law school and it did piss my father off, but he was pissed off anyway.

Rudy: In my first year of law school, everybody loved everybody else because we were all studying the law and the law was a noble thing. By my third year, you were lucky if you weren't murdered in your sleep. People stole exams, hid research materials from the library, and lied to the professors. Such as the nature of the profession.

Deck (Danny DeVito): You know what a rainmaker is, kid? The bucks are going to be falling from the sky.

*Raising Arizona

H.I. McDonough (Nicholas Cage): These were the happy days, the salad days as they say. And Ed felt that havin' a critter was the next logical step. It was all she thought about. Her point was that there was too much love and beauty for just the two of us and every day we kept a child out of the world was a day he might later regret havin' missed.

Ed (Holly Hunter): H.I., I'm barren.
H.I.: At first, I didn't believe it. That this woman who looked as fertile as the Tennessee Valley could not bear children. But the doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.

H.I.: Now y'all without sin can cast the first stone. But we thought it was unfair that some should have so many while others should have so few.

H.I.: With the benefit of hindsight, maybe it wasn't such a hot idea. But at the time, Ed's little plan seemed like the solution to all our problems and the answers to all our prayers.

Nathan Arizona Sr.: You can't sell leaf tables and no chairs. Chairs you got a dinette set, no chairs you got dick!

H.I.: There's what's right and there's what's right and never the t'wain shall meet.

H.I.: Sometimes its a hard world for little things.

FBI agent: What did the pajamas look like?
Nathan Sr.: I don't know, they were jammies they had Yodas and shit on them.

[To store clerk he's robbing]
H.I.: I'll be takin' these Huggies and uh whatever cash you got. You'd better hurry it up, I'm in dutch with the wife.

Old man: Son, you got a panty on your head.

[Evelle is robbing the grocery store.]
Evelle: Balloons. Hey, do these blow up into funny shapes at all?
Grocer: Well, no, unless round is funny.

Ed: If I'm as selfish and irresponsible as you...
H.I.: You're not that bad.
Ed: If I'm as bas as you, what are we to each other? You and me is just a fool's paradise.

Gale (John Goodman): Everybody freeze. Everybody get down on the ground.
Old Man: Well which is it young feller? You want me to freeze or get down on the ground? I mean to say if'n I freeze I can't rightly drop and if'n I drop I'm gonna be in motion.

Edwina McDonough (Holly Hunter): Gimme that baby, you wart-hog from hell!

Real Genius

Chris Knight: I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates who said, "I drank what?"

*Reality Bites

Troy (Ethan Hawke): So what do you say, Lelaina?
Lelaina (Winona Ryder): I'm not a valedictorian but I play one on tv.
Troy: We all know you slept your way to the podium.

Vickie (Janeane Garofalo): My favorite part about graduating now will be dodging my student loan officer for the rest of my life. He will be in cahoots with the Columbia Record and Tape Company guy whose been after my ass for years.

Lelaina: Troy, you're a master at the art of time suckage.
 

Michael (Ben Stiller): I'm a non-practicing jew.
Lelaina: Hey, I'm a non-practicing virgin.
 

Michael: What's your glitch?

Michael: Have I stepped over some line in the sands of coolness with you, because excuse me if somebody doesn't know the secret handshake with you.

Lelaina: Well, congratulations, Troy Dyer. Welcome to the world of the emotionally mature. It's a very nice place to visit. Hey, you may run in to Michael he lives here.

Ref,The

Lloyd: You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas mother? A big wooden cross. So whenever you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. submitted by Fen

Caroline: How can we both be in the marriage and I'm miserable and you're content?
Lloyd: Luck?

Gus (Denis Leary): From now on, the only person who gets to yell is me. Why? Because I have a gun. People who have guns get to do whatever they want. Married people without guns---for instance, you---DO NOT get to do whatever they want! Why? No guns! No guns, no yelling! See? Simple little quiz!

Lloyd: You know, you and my wife have a lot in common. You both think you have some right to life working out the way you want it to, and when it doesn't, you get to act the way you want. The only trouble with that is someone has to be responsible.
I'd love to run around and take classes and play with my inner-self! I'd love the freedom to be some pissed-off criminal with no responsibilities, except I don't have the time! But you don't see me with a gun. And you don't see me sleeping with someone else. You think my life turned out the way I wanted because I live in this house? You think every morning I wake up, look in the mirror and say "Gee I'm glad I'm me and not some 19-year-old billionaire rockstar with the body of an athlete and a 24-hour erection!" No I don't! So just excuse the shit out of me!

Lloyd: Caroline, the day you see anything through to the end, I'll stick my own dick in my ear.

Reservoir Dogs

Mr. Brown (Quentin Tarantino): I'm talking morning, noon, and night. Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick.
Mr. Blue: How many dicks is that?
Mr. White (Harvey Keitel): A lot.

Mr.White: Shit. You shoot me in a dream you better wake up and apologize.

Mr. Blonde (Micheal Madsen): You gonna bark all day little doggy, or are you gonna bite?

Mr. Blonde: If you're talking like a bitch, I'm gonna slap ya like a bitch!

Mr. Pink: Okay, first things fuckin' last!

Joe Cabot: You don't need proof when you have instinct.

Mr. Brown: Mr. Brown? That sounds too much like Mr. Shit.

Risky Business

Miles: Joel, you wanna know something? Every now and then say, "What the fuck." "What the fuck" gives you freedom. Freedom brings opportunity. Opportunity makes your future.

Joel (Tom Cruise): It seems to me if there were any logic to our language, trust would be a four letter word.

Joel: My name is Joel Goodson. I deal in human fulfillment. I grossed over eight thousand dollars in one night. Time of your life, huh kid?

River's Edge

Feck (Dennis Hopper): I had a girlfriend once. I loved her. And I killed her.
Samson: I killed my girlfriend too.
Feck: Did you love her?
Samson: She was okay.

Layne (Crispin Glover): I'm gonna put another quarter in this machine and take over the fuckin' universe!

Rock, The

John Patrick Mason (Sean Connery): Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.

Romeo Is Bleeding

Jack Grimaldi: People think that Hell is fire and brimstone and the Devil poking you in the butt with a pitchfork, but it's not. Hell is when you should have walked away, but you didn't.

Romeo + Juliet

*Romy and Michele's High School Reunion

Michele (Lisa Kudrow): You know, even though we've watched Pretty Woman like thirty-six times, I never get tired of making fun of it.

Michele: Did you lose weight?
Romy (Mira Sorvino): Actually, I have been trying this new fat free diet I invented. All I've had to eat for the past six days gummi bears, jelly beans, and candy corn.
Michele: Wow! I wish I had your discipline.

[The secret of her cigarette paper invention.]
Heather Mooney (Janeane Garofalo): Twice the taste in half the time for the gal on the go.

[discussing the reunion]
Romy: Are you going?
Heather: [holding a cigarette] I'd rather put this out in my ass.

Romy: I guess I won't be seeing you at the reunion, but I'll tell everyone you said, "Hi!"
Heather: Why don't you tell everyone I said to go fuck themselves for making my teen years a living hell.

Michele: You know, even though I had to wear that stupid back brace and you were kind of fat, we were still totally cutting edge.

Romy: I was so lucky to get mono. That was the best diet ever!

Michele: You look so good with blonde hair and black roots its like not even funny.

Romy: Would you excuse me? I cut my foot before and my shoe is filling up with blood.

Romy: I've been killing myself for eight days and I gained a pound.
Michele: That's impossible. Did you deduct sixteen pounds for your shoes?

Michele: I'm the Mary and you're the Rhoda.

Romy: You have absolutely no proof that you're cuter.
Michele: Oh, proof. You want proof? O.K. fine. Who lost their virginity first?
Romy: Oh, big wow, with you cousin Barry. I wouldn't brag about it.

Michele: I hope your babies look like monkeys!

Heather: If you fuck with me in any way, I will rip each and ever appendage from your body starting with your dick. Capice?

Romy: Heather, um, has anyone ever told you that smoking can kill you?
Heather: No. No one. Thank you.

Heather: This dress exacerbates the genetic betrayal that is my legacy.

Rushmore

Mr. Blume: What's the secret, Max?
Max: The secret?
Mr. Blume: Yeah, you seem to have it pretty figured out.
Max: The secret, I don't know... I guess you've just gotta find something you love to do and then... do it for the rest of your life. For me, it's going to Rushmore.

Max Fischer: I like your nurse's uniform, guy.
Dr. Peter Flynn: These are O.R. scrubs.
Max Fischer: Oh, are they?

Herman Blume: She's my Rushmore.
Max Fischer: I know. She was mine too.

*quotes have been corrected and are in chronological order
 

Created by : Sara
Last Updated: 2-2-01
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