Same Sex Snipers

In this age of freedom and restraint, a certain strain of friend has come to the forefront (also see man friends) - those who are, in fact, vibing you out.

The twist is, it could be one of your pals. I had this happen to me twice. Just think about it - was there ever one in the pack who you'd wind up alone with, and, after drinking, would "accidentally" touch your ass? Or say things that could be construed as sexually suggestive banter but then revert to "oh, guys, GUYS, I just loooove men!". Maybe even date or have a boyfriend, but they would always eye you like a piece of candy and give you the queasies??

Now, I can sorta understand the man friend thing (either nice guy hangarounds or those wanting "accidental" fucks), but believe me, you haven't experienced a mind fuck until you've had to contend with a friend who's seemingly in the closet or perhaps just bi-curious but not owning up to it. You can't quite out them, but you can't call them on it either, as denial and stealth are the M.O. ("I don't know what you're talking about")

God forbid you actually talk about it - chances are, they're in denial about their feelings and sexuality and haven't dealt with themselves. Plus everyone else is convinced that they are str8t as an arrow - you can't talk to anyone else for fear of outing them when they're not ready... Plus, you could be on crack and misconstruing - well - everything.

In my naivete, I continued to hang out with them but would occasionally get the "uh-oh" feeling. I'd plan in my mind a gentle confrontation of the behavior in question, but usually not find an opportunity, or they'll be really good for awhile, and then BAM! - another grope or perhaps an "accidental" flash . When a "bad touch" was forthcoming, I'd try and evade, but it took a great deal of energy to do all of this whilst everyone around you was quite clueless about the games going on. In the end, despite them being great people otherwise, I couldn't deal with the subterfuge, and instead eventually opted out.

Word of advice: Don't let it go to your head - you will never figure out what's going on in theirs. Perhaps you can fix them up with other ambiguous buddies....