but my person calls me Gremlin, just 'cause I'm into everything.
Before my person adopted me, I lived at the animal shelter. I thought THAT was bad untill I was forcibly removed from it into a totally different environment. Below are my thoughts before I grew to like it here (I was young and stupid then...)
DAY 21 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
DAY 22 - Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.
DAY 25 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan ......
DAY 28 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth. (more on this later...)
DAY 31 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
DAY 34 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies, and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.
But I can wait...it is only a matter of time. (More to come...)
|Calling in Sick| |Cat Haiku| |Pics of Me| |Cat Bathing I| |Cat One-Liners|
|Cat Bathing II| |Cat Rules| |Cruel Tricks| |Quiz|
|Webrings|
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