1. Scrub toilet and flush several times.

2. Fill toilet with warm water and add a squirt of pet shampoo. Have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and slam both lids shut (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not SIT on lid or get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any purchase they can find. Cat's efforts to free itself will generate a good deal of sudsing and washing motions. Drink beer while waiting.

5. Flush toilet a couple of times. This provides a "powerwash and rinse" which has been found to be quite effective to clean the cat.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet as if a jet engine is lodged up it's tail, and run outside.

8. Leave kitty to sulk and dry itself. Drink another beer while waiting.

-Birds!!-

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|Index| |Adopted| |Creation of Cats|
|Calling in Sick| |Cat Haiku| |Pics of Me| |Cat Bathing I| |Cat One-Liners|
|Cat Bathing II| |Cat Rules| |Cruel Tricks| |Quiz|
|Webrings|

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