Back to Index
WENN Captions
Email
Links
Past Commentaries

Season Two

The Furies
Been There, Done That
The Deliverer
Gabrielle's Hope
Warrior...Priestess...Tramp
The Quill is Mightier...
Maternal Instincts
The Bitter Suite
One Against an Army
Forgiven
King Con
When in Rome...
Forget Me Not

For Some Real Commentaries & Articles


On With the Show






© 1998

Xena: Closed Captioned for the Humor Impaired

  • 04-01-98

    Here's the commentary on The Dirty Half Dozen. My aren't these intro's getting creative!



    Quotes Worthy of Bardliness

    Camp Counselor Gab:
    "Ok, we'll need to build a firepit, grab some wood and get some water for the morning. Or I could do it."
    --Gabrielle (The Dirty Half Dozen)

    Oh That Minor Detail:
    "Afraid they might run?"
    "That and their habit of killing people."
    --Gabrielle & Xena (The Dirty Half Dozen)

    You say potAYto, I say potAHto. Let's Call the Whole Thing Off:
    "You say presence, I say stench."
    --Xena (The Dirty Half Dozen)

    Let's Not Beat Around the Bush:
    "You've got a hot spot for the killer babe. And when push comes to shove, you follow your lower instincts."
    --Agathon (The Dirty Half Dozen)

    Miscellany:

    Fashion Statement of the Year
    Cool cloaks. Tres cool, and we will see their return in The Debt & Maternal Instincts. A look that goes year-round.

    The Dirty Half Dozen Yearbook:
    Monlik
    Wimpy little man. Master thief, sure, but can't even fight some stupidly dressed warriors. Voted most likely to become a tree ornament. Weapon of choice: axe.
    Darnelle
    Hobbies: Track and Field. Voted most likely to have someone try to play William Tell with his chin. Weapon of choice: Spear/javelin.
    Walsim
    Nickname: Dredlock Boy. Definitely dreadful. Assassin. Weapon of choice: crossbow.
    Glaphyra
    Gloria Steinem's ancestor. Voted most likely to run a male escort service. Weapon of choice: daggers.
    Xena
    Homecoming Warrior Princess at the Prom of 44BC. Voted Most likely to kick your butt. Weapon of choice: Sword and Chakram.
    Gabrielle
    Amazon Princess/Queen. In her spare time, tells stories to make a few extra dinars to blow on some useless knick knack. Voted most likely to be underestimated & held at knifepoint all the time. Weapon of choice: Staff (possibly made from Hephaestus' wood since it actually knock a few of the walking garden equipment around)


    A Bunch of Happy Campers
    Nice reactions to Counselor Gab. Darnelle seems thoroughly amused while the rest are like "Yeah right."

    Nervous as a Longtail Cat in a Room Full of Rocking Chairs
    Do you get the impression that Walsim & Co don't trust each other?

    The Dumb and the Hopeless
    Agathon was doomed from the beginning. One, he's a weasely looking guy who needs to learn the meaning of a shower. He's pathetic too in his stupid looking RotoTiller outfit. Without Hephaestus' metal, he couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag. Personally, I think Ares did some magic to the metal so Xena's chakram could cut through his weird throwing thing after Agathon basically said I don't need you Ares. Big mistake there, Einstein.

Want to know what really happened in the episodes?
1