I don't think anyone in my family ever thought I was making it up or being a hypochondriac, but some of the ER nurses and doctors thought I was just coming in for the pain meds. My symptoms continued to worsen and my husband thought that I might have Leukemia due to such complaints as a metalic taste in my mouth, the nausea that would come and go and was even worse than morning sickness with pregnancy. I also began to have migraines again that I hadn't had in years, but the most puzzling symptom was that it hurt just for anyone to touch me, even just to pat me on the back or grab my arm. I also noticed that I bruised more easily than before, I was having trouble remembering things that should be very easy, and I would loose my temper at the drop of a hat. The most disturbing symptom just started about a month ago, in November 1999. I've been experiencing bouts of temporary paralasis on my right side when I get up in the morning. At times, I also have such severe pain in my right eye that I can't open my eye when the pain is present.

I just started on 20 mg. Prednisone a day and Soma for my fibromyalgia. The prednisone and soma relieved the pain for the first two or three days but then it came back and I had to go to the ER one night because the pain was so bad. I went back to the doctor today and he increased it to 40mg per day, and the pain is bearable, and I feel somewhat like a person. I just worry that I will gain even more since I am already overweight, but I guess it is the price that I have to pay if I want to be a good mom and wife.

I really haven't learned to cope with this very well yet. I hate to admit it but I have thought about killing myself so it would be over and I wouldn't be a burden to my husband. Yet, I have two wonderful boys that I can't bear to be without and a loving husband who has stood beside me through it all and never complained. If he can deal with it, then so can I. I just have to take it one day at a time! My thoughts to my family are that I know they've been frustrated that it has taken this long to find out what was wrong, but I am trying to be the loving, caring and supportive person they used to know. I want them to know that I try every day to not feel bad and loose my temper but sometimes I just get so frustrated that I can't help it, but I am trying to change that.

I would love to hear from anyone else that has just been diagnosed or has know for awhile to help me adjust to this. The doctor that diagnosed me has said the I would eventually need to see a Rheumatologist but I just can't afford the first office visit that is $300.00 here in my town. Any suggestions? I have insurance but I have to pay up front and I don't have it. Should I go to this other doctor or stay with the one I have? I don't know what to do, any advise would be helpful.
Thank You,