Can you believe that, even though I am a blonde [this week], there are still more trivial details in my head. The picture above depicts only one facet of me.Let me share these tidbits with you now and free up some brain cells for future use.


Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.
Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960.
The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.
Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
Both wives lost children while living in the White House.
Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
Both were shot in the head.
Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Kennedy's secretary was named Lincoln.
Both were assassinated by Southerners.
Both were succeeded by Southerners.
Both successors were named Johnson.
Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908. 
John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln was born in 1839. 
Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy was born in 1939. 
Both assassins were known by their three names.
Both names are comprised of fifteen letters.
Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse.
Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater.
Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.
And here's the kicker,
A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot, he was in Marilyn Monroe

Now, I know that I slipped that one in on you. It's something that may very well prove to be USEFUL at sometime. I try not to do that but, sometimes I have a brain burp and can't controll myself. The things to follow will not be useful in any way....I PROMISE!!


This diet is designed to help you cope with the stress that builds up
during the day. 

Breakfast:      1/2 grapefruit
                1 slice dry whole wheat toast
                8 oz. skimmed milk

Lunch:          4 oz. oven broiled chicken breast
                1 cup steamed spinach
                1 cup herb tea
                1 Oreo cookie

Mid-afternoon
snack:          The rest of the bag of Oreos
                2 pints rocky road ice cream
                1 jar hot fudge
                nuts, cherries, whipped cream

Dinner:                 2 loaves garlic bread with cheese
                large sausage and cheese pizza
                4 cans Pepsi
                3 Snickers bars

Evening snack:  Entire frozen cheesecake eaten directly from the 
                        freezer

Rules of the diet:
1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no
calories.

2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the
candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda. 

3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you don't
eat more than the other person.

4. Foods for medicinal purposes never count - such as: hot chocolate,
toast, martinis and Sara Lee cheesecake.

5. Movie related foods do not have additional calories because because
they are part of the entertainment p[ackage and not part of one's
personal diet. Examples are Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Junior Mints,
Red Hots and Tootsie Rolls. 

6. Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking causes
calorie leakage. 

7. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in
the process of preparing something. Examples are peanut butter on a
knife while making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon while making a
sundae.

8. Foods that have the same color have the same number of calories.
Examples: spinach and pistachio ice cream, mushrooms and white
chocolate. NOTE: chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted
for any other food color.


While a nursing student, doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital.
She calmed down, and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter in to the ER right away.

Seems that a year ago, some Boeing employees on the field decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plant and home. When they took it for a float on the Stilliguamish River, they were quite surprised by a Coast Guard helicopter homing in on the emergency locator that is activated when the raft is inflated. They are no longer employed there.

I worked for a while at a Wal-Mart store, selling sporting goods. As an employee of Wal-Mart you are sometimes required to make store-wide pages, e.g.,"I have a customer in hardware who needs assistance at the paint counter." One night a tentative female voice came over the intercom system with the (I kid you not) following message: "I have a customer by the balls in toys who needs assistance."

A police officer had a perfect hiding place for watching for speeders. But one day, everyone was under the speed limit, the officer found the problem: a 10 year old boy was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said "RADAR TRAP AHEAD." A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy's accomplice, another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket at his feet, full of change.

A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared, he sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther.
Then the man decided to help the butterfly, so he took a pair of scissors and sniped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.
The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.
Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.
What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If God allowed us to go through our life without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. And we could never fly.


Only in America... Can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance... Only in America... Are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink... Only in America... Do people order double cheeseburgers, a large fry, and a Diet Coke... Only in America... Do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters... Only in America... Do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight... Only in America... Do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage... Only in America... Do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...

ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED FROM NOAH'S ARK

1. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.
2. Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone might ask you to do something REALLY big.
3. Don't listen to critics -- do what has to be done.
4. Build on high ground.
5. For safety's sake, travel in pairs.
6. Two heads are better than one.
7. Speed isn't always an advantage. The cheetahs were on board, but so were the snails.
8. If you can't fight or flee -- float!
9. Take care of your animals as if they were the last ones on earth.
10. Don't forget that we're all in the same boat.
11. When the doo-doo gets really deep, don't sit there and complain----- shovel!!!
12. Stay below deck during the storm.
13. Remember that the ark was built by amateurs and the Titanic was built by professionals.
14. If you have to start over, have a friend by your side.
15. Remember that the woodpeckers INSIDE are often a bigger threat than the storm outside.
16. Don't miss the boat.
17. No matter how bleak it looks, there's always a rainbow on the other side.
18. "Stop what'ca doing, and do what God says!"