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The Splendor of Gender
A Sense of Grieving
Grieving, saying good-bye, finding our own way to acknowledge their life, their love. It is our way of closure, our way to express the emotional loss, our way to express our love for them.
(On October 12, 1998 Matthew Shepard died from the traumatic and brutal beating he received because he was gay. On October 16, 1998 he was laid to rest by his family, friends and supporters. Here, is my good-bye)
Dear Matthew,
On October 16, 1998 your family, friends and supporters said good-bye and laid you to rest. Unfortunately, at the same time those filled with hate, ignorance and violence not only protested, but danced in the streets and celebrated.
You will never get to read this letter, to hold it, to see it. We will never get to hug, shake hands or even meet to say hi. I will never see your smile, walk along side you or share in your joys. You have been taken away from your family, friends and those that had yet to meet you.
We have never met and, yet, it is like we have known each other forever. The hope and love in your heart, the struggle to be who you are. I will always remember you, your spirit will always be with me. You will symbolize to me all who have suffered at the hands of hate and ignorance, of prejudice and bigotry. I will not forget.
I am in great pain that you are gone, that your family was made to suffer, that hate is so strong in our world. But, the one thing that is the strongest, the one thing they can never take away, is your voice. Their narrowness and ignorance taught them to destroy that which they fear, to silence all that disagree. But now you no longer have one voice, you have millions. Your voice now speaks louder, stronger, and reaches around the world. Your voice speaks clearly of the destructive and evil nature of hate and intolerance.
You clearly symbolize to me the hypocrisy of their words, their actions. I hope others will remember your face, remember your tragedy when they hear the words of those that would have us believe that hate and intolerance toward others is okay, especially in the name of God, family values and love.
Your death has added fuel to the battle of politics, but it is not about politics. Your death has added fuel to the battle of christian values, but it is not about christian values. Your death has added fuel to the battle of family values, but it is not about family values. Your death is about your life and love. It does not matter who you were, what or who you liked, what your philosophies were, it was your life and no one, for no reason had the right to take that away from you. It was about hate, about those that preach it and those that act on it.
You can no longer speak, but your voice will never be silent, your memory never forgotten.
Good-bye Matthew, God bless you.
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